Go… and Be Happy.
I often wish I’d started blogging a while back. Then again, if I had, it would’ve been the most boring drawn-out process of arriving at the point I’m at now – which is happy. Yes, money is more than tight, referencing yesterday’s rant… but I am happy.
About a year and a half ago, I wrote a few blogs on another site. This site isn’t public and I’m thinking of closing it down soon, so I wanted a ‘storage bin’ to house a couple of them. I’m thinking my current blog would be a good storage choice. Rereading them just now, I once again stumbled upon what I was so desperately searching for from the very beginning…
The Quest for Happiness.
Guess I need a refresher course every now and again… So, go ahead – make the jump. But above all………. be happy.
Friday, April 10, 2009
A Good Life
Category: Life
Life is good.
Simple words, aren’t they? Actually these three words can branch out in so many directions and mean so many things. Right now I’m partial to what they symbolize to me.
Which is, the ultimate realization that I am happily independent. It’s taken me a while to say that with some enthusiasm, but man oh man – what a great feeling it is to finally get to know, and actually like, your own self.
And finally being able to say…. ‘I did it’. While smiling.
The forever analyst that I am, I’d find myself constantly searching for the flaws in my own character that might have led up to or even caused the ending of my old life. It took me a while to realize that until I embraced my own self, gave myself some actual worth, that I would in fact be alone in my new life. You absolutely are how others see you. Might be sad – but this is fact.
Being off work on a holiday, getting up and having the day with which to do exactly as you please, no one to answer to…. though a rarity, how glorious is that? There are so many people confined in a tempestuous or otherwise unhappy relationship that dictates their every move, even on a day off from work. Actually, days off are usually even more trying if you’re in a relationship that’s gone south. I sincerely remember.
This morning I do my usual cleanup of self and house – then cook 2 eggs, 3 pieces of bacon, 1 piece of toast lightly buttered, add grape jam – and oh, can’t forget the OJ with lots’ o pulp. Savoring every bite sitting on my porch while looking out at all the new greenery, I thought to myself…. ‘only breakfast at the beach could top this right now’. Mr. Huge Hovering Devil Bee who’s positioned himself directly above the railing to watch me eat doesn’t even bother me.
The most simplistic things in life really are the most important. The sunrises, sunsets…. the birds building and mating in the Spring (in my hanging basket, no less). A good breakfast. Looking forward to the imminent thunderstorm. Crossing the bridge and gazing at the ‘diamonds on the water’; locking them into memory. I told a friend recently that I’ve gotten pretty good at driving a straight line on the bridge while my head is turned completely towards the lake. LOL In any case, the love and appreciation for these things will only come once you are truly satisfied and content with your own self worth. I am forever thankful for being at that point in my life.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Setting the REAL record straight
Category: Romance and Relationships
Every so often I get the urge to write a blog. Although the urge isn’t really there today, I more just feel the need to. Jot down some things that have been weighing on my mind, all related to the colorful year I’ve had so far. A year that’s made me feel failure-esque for the most part.
To try and understand how there can be so many fake people in the world is a daily struggle. What does it take anymore to be REAL? Out of two relationships I’ve had this year, both have failed. I’m not saying that I’m totally blameless. What I am saying is that both of these individuals happened to not be ‘real’.
Though a world different in all other areas, both individuals had this one little trait in common. Neither were genuine – neither were real. They both were masters of disguising theirselves as someone they were not. Whether it’s covering up something of grave importance (case #1) or leading someone to believe you lead a life that doesn’t really exist, along with hidden anger issues (case #2) – the simple fact remains… YOU AREN’T BEING REAL.
I realize it’s better to know sooner rather than later. At the time, it did make me wonder why I even bothered to put myself out there. Was there something about me that attracted this type of masqueraded personality? Was I really that gullible? Or did I want to be loved so badly that I was turning my head to the obvious? After much thought, I’ve decided to suspend the search for the answer – instead moving forward with slightly more ware on life this time.
Recently I’ve reconnected with someone who has showed me that there are still real people in the world. This person has also dealt with a not-real someone in their own life for many years. It’s been helpful and healing to share our experiences, and realize that we aren’t so alone in our quest to find someone out there that is genuine. Although we’re still in the early stages of a relationship, I can say that through him, I am slowly learning to trust again. That guard is still somewhat in place – as I’m sure his is too. We’d both be fools not to, right?
Water
I don’t much believe in coincidence. I think it’s a rare if ever instance where something happens that doesn’t have meaning behind it. Now I know that’s just my opinion, but ya have to admit that way of thinking does make life a bit more interesting. Keeps the ole’ brain active. Anywho, that’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it.
It’s raining to beat the band this morning. Thunderstorms arrived late yesterday, and the rain has been torrential at times. It’s supposed to continue throughout the day today, and the area’s in bad need of it so I say bring it on.
Water.
You could never have convinced me a year ago that this ole’ girl would turn country – but that’s exactly what has happened. Although I still love my alternative, I have my radio set to the two local country stations 24/7. Hell I even sleep to it.
Back to coincidence. So I’m driving in to work this morning in the torrential rain and the song Water by Brad Paisley comes on. Here’s a guy who must heart the wet stuff just as much as I do. You’ve seriously got to watch this video… not only is it a terrific song but it’s probably the most ‘fun’ video I’ve ever seen!!
**Brad Paisley is seriously hot in it too… OMG… he SO reminds me of my own guy… WOW**
Yeah when that summer sun starts to beatin’ down
And you don’t know what to do
Grab your swimming trunks
Ice up that old igloo
Drive until the map turns blue
This is a song I can go to my happy place with. Come along song, and travel with me to my happy place. You can come too, Bradley. JK, I’ll bring your stunt-double instead, the best guy in the universe.
All you really need this time of year
Is a pair of shades
And ice cold beer
And a place to sit somewhere near
Water.
Older… not necessarily wiser
The older I get, the more instances occur where I notice myself doing something foolish or embarrassing.
About a week ago, I had to go to the post office to get some stamps. The post office in my little town is actually located in the very back of a little Hallmark shop. I easily parked near the front, went in and did my business. As I got back to my car, I looked down and noticed there were very small chips of white paint coming off near the middle trim of my drivers door. I thought, damn, this car really is getting some age on it! I’d washed it not much more than a month prior, but failed to notice these little flaws. Still disbelieving, I crouched down and ran my fingers over and over the spots on my door. I clicked my keyfob to unlock my door, and didn’t pay much attention to the fact it didn’t initially unlock (sometimes I do have to click it two or three times, battery needs replacing). Crouched down again and ran my fingers over the little spots of chipped paint. Then I stood up again to unlock the door – damn, why isn’t it unlocking? I look down and notice that even the molding near the window is a more discolored black than I remember. WTH? Disparaged at this point over the appearance of my car, I click once more to unlock.
The lightbulb in my head finally came on. Oh God, this wasn’t my car. Same make, same model, same year, same color… but I am in fact standing here rubbing molesting someone else’s car. Panic-stricken, I look around and immediately take heed of the fact that I was parked another row over.
This isn’t the first time I’ve done this – but in my defense it’s been at least several months. The last time, it wasn’t even my model of car (it was white though).
I stopped at the grocery store before going in to work this morning. Whenever I’m able, I get my discount card out for scanning and have my wallet ready. As the lady in front of me finishes up, the cashier thanks her and promptly turns to me to greet me and take my card. I hand it to her, and notice a longer-than-should-be pause. She says “I’ll let you hang onto that for now”. I was handing her my bleeping ATM card. I’ll have to say she was super-gracious about it and didn’t try to (further) embarrass me.
Then there’s my speeding ticket of ’09 where I handed the officer my ATM card instead of my license. Of course that was likely a direct result of him sliding in sideways behind me to barracade me in a front parking spot at Walmart, like I had just robbed a bank or something. The common criminal that I am. I’ll have to say that cop very much deserved his severe lisp.
How about this one. I’ll ask a store clerk where something is, and they’ll point it out to me. It will NOT be visible to me. We can be almost right at it – they point to the area, describe what it’s in front of/beside of, then finally look at me in disbelief – no, I don’t see it. It’s just one of Murphy’s laws. I keep saying Ima stop asking where a certain thing is at because I always feel like an ass in the end. Anybody else have this (consistently) happen to them??
One thing’s for sure. The future should prove to be very entertaining… for others. 🙂
Hey, who moved my cheese??
I was told a long long time ago that I was a person that didn’t deal well with change. Suffice to say I’ve kicked that little issue. Oh hell – have I? With all the changes these past two years have held, guess I could say I’ve been forced to deal with change a little better. Rather, I like to think it all started a little over five years ago when I was forced to change jobs after an almost 12-year tenure. That one was a biggie.
I guess I am a little set in my ways. Just a little. But I’m also obsessive about some things. A lot. We were discussing the ‘obsessive’ in us at work the other day (okay primarily the obsessive in me). Ah, our little habits…our own eccentricities.
Hmm, if my boyfriend reads this he might not want to be my boyfriend anymore – but I’m banking on the fact that he’s already onto most of my little quirks.
I have my own personal parking spaces. Umm, at home and at work. No, it doesn’t have my name on it. At home, second one from the end. At work, perfectly centered with the front door. I get perturbed when someone takes My Spot at home – no one bothers me at work. At home when I take my trash out, I compact the air out of it – every single time. And the bag that goes back in the can will be freshly installed minus any additional air between bag and can. At all. In fact, I hate extra amounts of air in any bag – I always compress the air out of all bags I deal with (even when changing cat litter) whenever possible.
I am married to my camera. I will hold anyone and everyone up in order to get my shot – and I will get my shot. I go back to the door after I’ve locked it to ‘make sure’ and, if inside – recheck it; if outside, I give it exactly two hard tugs to make sure it won’t open. Every single time.
I am, after all, of human species. Keeping with typical Piscean fashion, I can be classified as a lazy perfectionist – a most terrible of combinations. I suffer from anxiety and calm, depression and elation, and anger and love – all at the same time. I’m odd, I’m different – and naturally me. But after all, eccentricity is a first cousin to originality…
Last day
So onto the last day of the weekend. That’s always what I consider Sunday, really, and I don’t mean it to sound at all sacreligious. Its just how I think of it when it comes to going back to work tomorrow.
This has once again been a great weekend. I knew it was gonna rain pretty much the whole time but I didn’t care – add the fact we needed it. As long as I get to spend time with my love then the sun is always shining. I know I’ve written enough sappy stuff lately so I won’t taint yet another blog. Oh wait, I’d better not make any promises!
Have I mentioned how much in love I am? 😉
Made an angel food cake last night and a pasta salad, in the middle of doing the occasional tequila shot. Later today the angel food cake will be adorned with fresh strawberries, strawberry drizzle and whipped topping, transforming it into strawberry shortcake. I figured I needed to cook something after all the eating out we’ve done the last few days. I do love to cook, but it’s like I said just last night – I wish I had better resources.
As I lay here watching my love sleep (so very peacefully), I wonder just how someone could abuse this beautiful man with such a large heart. For it to become a way of life, a means of living. Enduring it on a daily, weekly, yearly basis. To have your heart and trust trampled on like it was nothing more than a filthy rag. Well, my dear love… know that those days are over, forevermore. Sometimes a train wreck really does have it’s survivors.
The Sure Thing
About a week ago a local channel aired an 80’s movie I hadn’t seen in a long time called The Sure Thing. The plot: an unlikely pair of college students that end up falling for each other during a roadtrip to California.
So the name got me thinking – The Sure Thing. How many sure things are there in life? Not many. How can we ever be completely certain of a sure thing? The dictionary describes a sure thing as “An outcome that is assured; a certainty; something that is guaranteed to be successful”.
The only one sure thing I’ve ever had in life personally is that beautiful and shining Promise of eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. That is it – though that is certainly more than we could ever hope for.
So back to what I was leading up to… is it ever possible to have a sure thing in a human being? To actually put your complete trust, love and confidence into a person, and see and feel that trust, love and confidence returned back to you? Moreso, is it smart to do this? Maybe not. What I do know is the more times you’ve been burned in your life, the more difficult it becomes to trust again. Maybe it’s just me, but I think that in order to acquire a sure thing – if there is a human version of a sure thing out there – you have to be willing to take some risks. To not only remain open, but actually be okay with the possibility of failure.
I’ve always wanted that complete trust factor in my life. Always always. Undivided, unequivocal, undiminished trust. Trust that’s so concrete there’s never any room for questions. A two-way trust that is so openly confident that it illuminates the darkness.
I believe I’ve found it – of this I feel more sure than I’ve felt about anything in my entire life.
Alpha Omega
It’s here, that time… it’s finally here. I’m holding in my hands the tickets to my little girl’s college commencement ceremony. Boy, no one could’ve made me believe that simply being handed the tickets would throw me in such an emotional state.
It seems like only yesterday we were moving her in her dorm. I can see her now running around in her Yankees Jeter jersey and 2 long pig-tail braids hanging down beneath her hat. It was hotter than 10 Haitis outside, and she and her roomie had packed enough between 3 cars and a large SUV to not only furnish the dorm room but an entire apartment.
Dorm move-in day, Aug. 17th 2006 – Julia on right, her roomie Lauren on left.
Since it was the first freshman move-in day, the campus was swamped with students and parents everywhere. Her roomie Lauren’s Dad, her Dad and I made countless trips back and forth from the parking lot to the dorm building in the extreme heat. After just a few trips, we noticed the girls were nowhere to be found. They were out being social butterflies while we were moving them in! As I look back, I remember arguing with her Dad about it. I know he remembers this, and we can actually laugh about it now. There at the end, when we were ringing wet and about to pass out from the heat, in bops Julia and Lauren with a couple of ‘cute’ strong lads they’d hooked up with to ‘help’ us. Those lads ended up getting the last load or two, and with us being at the passing-out point, we were ever-grateful.
Julia really is a rare find of a kid. From start to finish, her college education has totally been funded through her own student loans. It was to be a tenure that ended up surviving a series of curve balls – including the breakup of her parent’s marriage halfway through it. I’ve watched as countless friends of hers have either dropped out or otherwise were dismissed from college because of grades – but hers is a true success story. Over the last four years, I watched her worked her ass off for the education she knew she needed in life. She’s now earned this reward by much sweat of her brow – time, effort, and a lot of hard work. She’s always been the kind of girl that knows what she wants, and doesn’t mind working hard to get there.
I already know that the day in mid-May when she walks across the stage will be one of the most emotional days of my life. I could not be more proud of her, and I know for a fact her entire family is too.
Extreme memories
A while back I wrote a blog on current airport security in the States and my heavy thoughts on profiling. It’s a subject I have very strong opinions on and stated so in aforementioned blog, so I won’t rant about it again. Those of you who know me know that I’m a girl who will always live in the shadow of 9/11, lest I never forget. The shit I hear and read about daily on the news makes my gut wrench, and as I checked facts online tonight I’ve ran across more than I care to mention that makes my blood fucking boil – including thumbnail pics and links to videos of the murderous decapitations of Paul Johnson Jr. and Daniel Pearl. Enough said.
I recently received an interesting email that brought the subject of profiling fresh to the forefront of my mind again. (That’s right, look out…) This particular email has circulated around for years, which explains the original gap that skipped the years 2003-2008 – then someone inserted the Ft. Hood attack of 2009. Being the Bonster I am, I took the liberty of inserting my own material for those missing years since I felt it was too large of a gap to leave unaccounted for. Of course, I only picked one event per year to list – but believe me there were many to choose from. As always, I did my homework on the fact-checks.
Absolutely No Profiling! Pause a moment, reflect back… and take the following multiple choice test.
These events are actual events from history. They really happened! Do you remember?
Okay, so here’s the test.
1. In 1968 Bobby Kennedy was shot and killed by:
a. Superman b. Jay Leno c. Harry Potter d. A Muslim male extremist between the ages of 17 and 402. In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were kidnapped and massacred by :
a. Olga Corbett b. Sitting Bull c. Arnold Schwarzenegger d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 403. In 1979, the US embassy in Iran was taken over by:
a. Lost Norwegiansb. Elvis
c. A tour bus full of 80-year-old women
d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40
4. During the 1980’s a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by:
a. John Dillinger b. The King of Sweden c. The Boy Scouts d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 405. In 1983, the US Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by:
a. A pizza delivery boy b. Pee Wee Herman c. Geraldo Rivera d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 406. In 1985 the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70 year old American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard in his wheelchair by:
a. The Smurfs b. Davey Jones c. The Little Mermaid d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 407. In 1985 TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens, and a US Navy diver trying to rescue passengers was murdered by:
a. Captain Kidd b. Charles Lindberg c. Mother Teresa d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 408. In 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 was bombed by:
a. Scooby Doo b. The Tooth Fairy c. The Sundance Kid d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 409. In 1993 the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by:
a. Richard Simmons b. Grandma Moses c. Michael Jordan d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4010. In 1998, the US embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by:
a. Mr. Rogers b. Hillary Clinton, to distract attention from Wild Bill’s women problems c. The World Wrestling Federation d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4011. On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked; two were used as missiles to take out the World Trade Centers and of the remaining two, one crashed into the US Pentagon and the other was diverted and crashed by the passengers.
Thousands of people were killed by:
a. Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd b. The Supreme Court of Florida c. Mr. Bean d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4012. In 2002 the United States fought a war in Afghanistan against:
a. Enron b. The Lutheran Church c. The NFL d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4013. In 2002 reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by:
a. Bonnie and Clyde b. Captain Kangaroo c. Billy Graham d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4014. In 2003, a series of events now known as the Casablanca bombings went down in Morocco. In all, 33 civilians were killed by:
a. Barney b. Toby Keith c. Mr. Magoo d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4015. In 2004, Paul Johnson Jr. was kidnapped and executed along with 2 other Americans and a BBC cameraman in Saudi Arabia by:
a. Leap Frog b. Tony Stewart c. Pedro d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4016. In 2005, 3 American hotels in Jordan (the Radisson, Grand Hyatt and Days Inn) were hit with bombs. 57 people were killed by:
a. A computer software program b. PETA c. My iPhone d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4017. In 2006, what is now referred to as the Sadr City bombings occurred, a series of car bombs and mortar attacks. It was to be the second deadliest attack since the beginning of the Iraq war in 2003. At least 215 people were killed and 257 were injured by:
a. The Bonster b. Bon’s cat Camille c. Bon’s gorgeous boyfriend d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4018. In 2007, the detonation of 2 car bombs near Algeria’s Constitutional Council and United Nations offices caused the death of over 60 people by:
a. Alex Trebek b. Marilyn Manson c. Dolly Parton d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 4019. In 2008, a car bomb and rocket hit the US Embassy in Yemen as staff arrived to work. 16 people were killed by:
a. Hugh Hefner b. The entire cast of Dancing with the Stars c. Gilligan d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40No, I really don’t see a pattern here to justify profiling, do you? So, just to ensure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly fanatics intent on killing us, airport security screeners will no longer be allowed to profile certain people.. They must instead conduct random searches of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper identification, secret agents who are members of the President’s security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of Honor winner and former Governor Joe Foss, but leave Muslim Males between the ages 17 and 40 alone lest they be guilty of profiling.
20. In 2009, Fort Hood Texas – 13 people were killed and 30 some odd others were wounded by…
a. Fox News b. Howard Stern c. The Dude who broke in your car d. A Muslim male extremist between the ages of 17 and 40 (guess what folks, he was 39…)Tell me… does this fit the PROFILE?! I rest my effing case.
So if the A through C’s on the multiple choices weren’t hilarious enough for ya – I just heard the best (and most awesomely BRILLIANT) semi-solution to terrorism on planes. While listening to my local 103.7 (Tanner in the Morning w/ Catherine Lane) he came up with this:
How about every airport now come equipped with this ‘booth’ that every potential passenger walks into. This ‘safety’ booth will have the ability to automatically detect and detonate any bomb that walks inside it. BAM! There’s our solution. Seriously, it’s brilliant thinking at its best. Can you imagine hearing this over the airport intercom? “Attention, all passengers of Flight 1393 en route to Belgium… we now have a seat available…”
😆
A new grind
Back to the grind this morning. A grind I’m very thankful for, mind you – it’s just that I, like most working Americans on a Monday morning, would just rather be doing other things.
Had a busy weekend, even semi-productive. Got my place vacuumed, and I won’t say how long it’d been since I’d done that. My babydoll took me out to a Japanese steakhouse – a local one that’s been around forever but we’d never tried. We now have a new favorite, this place so totally rocked. The food was out of this world, they served us like we were the only people in there, and the prices could even be considered cheap! When we left, we both felt as though we’d been given royal treatment. I can’t wait to go back! Just remind me not to go on my birthday because they pie you. Me no like pie in face.
I also attended a friends 50th birthday party and had an awesome time. The back yard that belonged to the girl that threw the party was nothing short of amazing, and she’d done it all herself. From a little pond with the stacked slender rock, cascading water and lilypads, to a firepit on up, and a workshop with a woman’s touch at the end. I can’t do justice in describing it all – it felt just like being at the mountains with all it’s sereneness. She even had a eucalyptus tree, which in my 42 years of living I’ve never seen. I met some very sweet and interesting people too – one of which is a crime scene supervisor. Yep, just like the show CSI. I’ve definitely come to realize that it must take a very special person to do this ‘job’. Ya must have to be on top of your game 200% of the time. Out of all we talked about, the thing that stuck with me the most was when she said ‘I wanted to have a career helping people. To me, this is the ultimate way of helping people’. Yeah, a special person indeed.
My TMJ (temporomandibular joint disorder) gave me a real fit this weekend, so I just basically ate ibuprofen the whole time. I never know when or where it’ll kick in full force, but it sure did this weekend – and moreso than it’s done in a long time. Ugh. Better this morning, though!
Work calls. Everyone have an awesome week, and be blessed! ♥
Assets
It’s been a while since I’ve done it – dedicate a blog to count my many blessings. I’ve done enough bitching here recently about my taxes and a few other things, that I actually think I’m overdue on this blessing count.
First and foremost, for the Son Jesus – whom our Lord sent down to die for my countless sins so that I may be cleansed forevermore. I’m very much aware that I have a potty mouth more often than not, but I do know the Truth. I’ll just continue to work on my potty mouth.
I am thankful for the ride to work in the morning, and the sun and the spring. The many leaves that have filled in and shape the trees now, and all the green. Work… what on earth would I do without my job? Can’t even begin to imagine an answer for that one. My ever-faithful car, which has really been a low-maintenance rock of a car. Back home, I have a pantry and refrigerator both full of food. And drink. My small furbaby who loves me unconditionally – every day running to meet me at the door. When I pick her up, she buries her little head in my neck to show me just how far that unconditional love goes.
I’m blessed to have all the comforts I have in my home – my computer, my television, my cozy little kitchen with everything I could ever need at my fingertips. The ease – the ease of it all. The warm baths and hot showers. My exercise machine, my warm comfy bed. The sprawling balcony which overlooks the forest and has become my outdoor sanctuary, and all the living greenery that makes it my home. The clothes and accessories I wear, every toiletry I could ever need in my entire life is at my fingertips. And, I feel healthy.
I’m thankful for my family, and my circle of friends. I could never express how much I truly love and treasure them. My beautiful Mom and Dad who have taught me what love for our Lord really is. My beautiful daughter who has accomplished more in life than I ever thought humanly possible, and is still attacking life largely. And the beautiful man in my life that shows me daily how much he loves me, through his actions and words. I honestly cannot imagine my life without him in it now.
Blessings, countless blessings. Gotta list them out every so often – lest we dwell on the things in life that just don’t matter so much…
Lovin Fridays
What a nice Friday night. My weekend started around 3:30pm yesterday, when I tanned, showered and waited on K. We went down to a local mall ( I had a birthday gift card yet to spend) and scored several new spring threads. K even got his self a couple pairs of shorts and a few shirts, JCPenneys was having an awesome sale and we happened upon the store at exactly the right time. Neither one of us are shoppers, so we weren’t in there long at all.
From there we met his Mom at a Mexican restaurant across the street. By this time it was almost 8pm and we had a little wait – but it was worth it. We all had a blast and got a belly full. So full, in fact, that we weren’t up long at all once home. Lights out.
Now the sun is struggling to stream through the trees (that’s okay, I’m not complaining about the leaves, love ’em) and it’s beautiful out. A little chilly compared to waking up in the 60’s with highs of 80’s, but this is only mid-April anyway, right? Better enjoy the midtones while we can. I still may give the ole’ “bagel on the balcony” thing a whirl. 🙂
The mariner has landed
I’ve decided that my ‘theme’ of the summer is gonna be nautical (yeah I know, my theme every summer is nautical). I’m now on a very stringent search for a silver pendant for a necklace. Nautically-themed, and I definitely want it to include an anchor. I ran across this one online and fell in love with it. I found it about a month ago and saved the picture, but I don’t know what website I found it on! The dufus I am.
Onto the rant of the day. Why can’t everyone just mind their manners and act nice? It’s not that difficult really. There’s always gonna be that idiot out there waiting to ruin your day. If ya don’t believe me, just look up a (positive) news story or youtube video, and check out the flow of comments underneath. I guarantee you the more comments it has, the more idiots on there saying stupid chit just to try and stir the pot or offend someone. Now I see why alot of people who upload vids to youtube disable the ability to leave comments.
So a famous television producer (formerly of Survivor) is being held in suspicion of the death of his wife while on vacation in Cancun. Now it’s come out that last weekend she found out he was having an affair. YOU KNOW ME, HERE IT COMES…. WTF??? Are ALL men cheaters? Wait, I know the answer to that – but it still doesn’t stop me from asking the question from time to time. What the hell are these men thinking? With? Ya wanna have sex with someone other than your wife? Okay, then save her the pain and humiliation and just separate first. Is it really that hard? Pardon the pun…
It’s all a big steamin’ pile of pelosi, I tell you.
I received an email recently that I just have to share the contents of.
NEW CUSS WORD
(No, not curse… we call it cuss here in the south so get used to it)
Years ago when I sometimes used unsavory language, I often used the expression “Bull S***.” As I grew up a bit and discovered it was not necessary to use such crude language, the expression became “BS.”
What did I really mean when I used those expressions? I meant that something was ridiculous, or idiotic or a half truth or just plain stupid. It covered any number of negative formats. The dictionary defines it as: nonsense; especially: foolish insolent talk.
I have decided that I no longer will use either of those expressions in the future. When I have a need to express such feelings, I will use the word “pelosi.” Let me use it in a sentence. “That’s just a bunch of pelosi.” I encourage you to do the same. It is such a nasty sounding word, it really packs a punch, we are no longer being vulgar, and it clearly expresses our feelings. If enough of us use it, perhaps the word could be entered into the dictionary.
When on a ranch watch your step and don’t step in pelosi. It will get on the bottom of your boot and won’t go away until the next election. What a fitting and descriptive legacy for the Speaker of the House!
PASS IT ON TO AT LEAST 10,000,000 PEOPLE. DO NOT BREAK THIS CHAIN OR YOU WILL GET MORE PELOSI THAN YOU CAN SHAKE A BULL AT.
Please and thank you. 
Second chances
I don’t know what it’s gonna take for me to figure out that 20 minutes is not enough time for me to get ready for work in the morning. Ugh.
Ever since 9/11, I’ve made it a point to stay up on current news and information. For this reason, I signed up to receive the cnn ‘breaking news’ emails at work. This was what I came into this morning:
……A passenger on a United flight from Washington to Denver apparently tried to set shoe on fire, officials said.
WTF?
Other than all the pollen, I am enjoying the forest that has finally filled in beyond my balcony. Here’s a shot from yesterday evening.
On the drive in to work this morning, once again I got to thinking about life. (sound the alarms) A certain Daughtry song is very thought-provoking when it comes to second chances in life.
All that I’m after is a life full of laughter, as long as I’m laughin’ with you… All that still matters is love ever after, after the life we’ve been through…’Cause I know there’s no life after you.
Pretty deep.
Olé
Had my guy over to eat last night. I cooked… 
You got it. Full-on course o’ mexican. Ground beef, chicken and steak with all the trimmings along with refried beans, spanish rice, chips and fire-roasted salsa. Pretty much one of those dishes I could eat every day.
The now well-traveled Guadalupé says ‘Hola, Amigos – Bienvenidos!’ Hey, who needs a travelocity gnome when you’ve got a traveling Guadalupé!? I found this little guy yesterday (don’t ask me how). The name Guadalupé immediately came to mind (don’t ask me why). After that, he circulated around in pretty much everything I did. Guadalupé has made appearances in my work, emails, IMs and texts – now he’s found his way into my blog. Who knows where he and his 5 o’clock shadow will end up next. Okay, I think I mentioned yesterday that it actually takes very little to entertain me, and if there’s any one thing I’m good at – it’s entertaining myself.
So I was danger ALERT thinking about a tweet I recently saw. Yeah, twitter really can be educational. It’s always been interesting to me how stoplights operate. Whether or not they’re timed or actually have a sensor has always been a hilariously controversial subject between a certain person and myself. Of course there’s a webpage answer – I would expect nothing less!! Functionality of a traffic light
I think facebook poking is funny as hell. Especially the ‘perpetual’ poke. Have I mentioned the fact that it takes very little to entertain me?
Prime Time
Ah, the beautiful color of Spring – green yellow.
I don’t really have any insightful thoughts this morning (or crazed ramblings, to the readers’ advantage). My thoughts and prayers do go out to all the families in WVA affected by the terrible mining explosion. I read that it’s the most fatal mining tragedy to occur in America since 1984. What these families must be going through is simply incomprehensible.
Time is really going by fast escaping me, so much so that it’s making my head spin. Really. I told someone yesterday that there just doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day to get everything done, and then get to bed on time. Bad thing is, I don’t know when all this became so apparent…
I SO want to enjoy the spring and summer months. I wanna sit on my porch and enjoy a bagel and orange juice (minus the bees and wasps, wtf’s up with them this year anyway). I wanna go places. I wanna wear my flip-flops, tank tops and shorts 24/7 (okay, I actually wanna do this year-round). I wanna feel the warm summer night air on my bare skin while listening to the crickets sing. I wanna see the hummingbirds fight for their food. I wanna feel the waves crash on my thighs. I wanna drink a seabreeze while feeling the light tingle of too much sun for the day. I wanna lie on a boat all day long on the lake, jumping in every now and again to cool off. I wanna….
Yep – the time is prime. Too bad there’s just not enough hours in the day to enjoy it.
Easter Seal
It’s Easter Sunday, and He Has Risen. I thank God for sending his only son down to us to die for our sins – and for giving us this beautiful day to serve as a reminder. My faith in this most generous and selfless act is forever sealed.
It’s been the best weekend of the year so far for me, and Ima happy girl. 😆 I was off Friday, so we got up that morning and headed to the (still somewhat new) indoor fleamarket in a neighboring town. After that I went to see my Dad for his birthday since they had plans the day before. That night, I packed up myself and Camille and headed to my guy’s house for the weekend. Saturday morning he cooked a feast of a breakfast including hashbrowns, then suggested we walk some of it off by visiting the new IKEA store in the University area. He had been there before, first time for me. Simply put, that place is massive.
Camille has been one trip of a cat this time around. She’s enjoyed the many springtime birds that taunt her through so many open windows. The weather’s been just perfect.
I’m currently laying out in the sun watching him wax my car. Life is good, and I don’t want this weekend to end.
Psyche
The local news here in the big city this morning – 2 adults, 2 children dead in apparent murder-suicide. My God. I can’t help but wonder what kind of situation could preempt a horrific act like that. It’s in a ‘good’ part of town, too – which I realize of course means zilch. The entire country world has gone to hell in a handbasket, as my Mammaw used to say.
The human mind is a delicate thing, I suppose. More and more people out there just seem prone to “snap”. I used to have road rage on occasion, I admit it – but now? No way. You have no idea who’s in the car next to you or whether they’ll blow your head off just for reason of you pissing ’em off. We have to worry about this for the upcoming generation, our children. Just leaving the house anymore will put your life in severe danger.
We also had a full moon last night.
On another, more positive note – I get to see my guy tonight. 🙂 We recently made a deal to spend time together at least once during the work week. Now that it’s officially Spring, that shouldn’t be too hard. I find myself wanting to spend more and more time outside.
The end of the week, starting with Good Friday, begins our holiday of Easter. Easter is defined as the Christian celebration of the Resurrection of Christ; celebrated on the Sunday following the first full moon after the vernal equinox.
Today however starts Passover. Many people don’t know the meaning of this Jewish holiday (yes I more than realize I’m not Jewish). Passover commemorates the emancipation of the Israelites from slavery in ancient Egypt.
After many decades of slavery to the Egyptian Pharaohs, during which time the Israelites were subjected to backbreaking labor and unbearable horrors, God saw the people’s distress and sent Moses to Pharaoh with a message: “Send forth My people, so that they may serve Me.” But despite numerous warnings, Pharaoh refused to heed God’s command. God then sent upon Egypt ten devastating plagues, afflicting them and destroying everything from their livestock to their crops as well as killing their firstborn. While doing so, God spared the Children of Israel, “passing over” their homes—hence the name of the holiday. Pharaoh’s resistance was broken, and he virtually chased his former slaves out of the land. It is said that the Israelites left in such a hurry, in fact, that the bread they baked as provisions for the way did not have time to rise. 600,000 adult males, plus many more woman and children, left Egypt on that day, and began the trek to Mount Sinai and their birth as ‘God’s chosen people’.
So there’s your history lesson for the day. Interesting stuff.
Good Monday
This was a good weekend. Friday night we went out for mexican and ate out on the covered balcony for the first time this year. We had it to ourselves as it was a little nipply nippy out there, especially as the sun went beyond the horizon. It was still nice, though – a little prelude of the good times to come this summer. Saturday, I went to my guys house where he surprised me with a bottle of wine and a homemade salad to top all human salads… I mean this thing was the bomb. Anything and everything you can imagine, a true color wheel. Red onions, black olives, green and red bell peppers, carrots, cucumbers, tomatoes, block cheese, green onions, and cubed chicken and turkey. In addition, he had went out and bought the movie New Moon for us to watch that evening. Sunday afternoon, my daughter and I tested out the newest fleamarket in our area, called Trader Marc’s. A totally-indoor fleamarket sized to epic proportions. I really liked this place – the inside was well-organized, a good variety of different items, and well – it was just ‘classy’ compared to any other fleamarket I’ve ever been to. I really was impressed. Even more impressive to me were the vendors theirselves. We spent more time talking to the vendors than we did shopping. A happy bunch, they were – all so talkative in their (mostly) southern drawl. Oh how I do love a good southern drawl…
A severe set of storms ran through last night. With it came tornado warning after tornado warning. Hail, the whole nine yards (minus the tornado, thank God). The greenery is becoming oh so abundant as the sun continues to rise this morning.
A four-day work week this week! Yay… I’m fortunate enough to have Good Friday off. So far the forecast calls for sunny and temps around 80. I think can live with that.
Happiness, definition from Wikipedia… A state of mind or feeling characterized by contentment, love, satisfaction, pleasure, or joy.
The image used for happiness?
Just thought I’d throw that in there. 😉
22 years ago
Doesn’t seem possible it could be that many years, but it is. My little girl is 22 today.
I often think back to the time before her birth. She was comfortable right where she was at, inside me. Originally scheduled to be a Pisces, she decided to stay put for three more weeks deeming her a headstrong Aries. I was desperate to see my new baby, which led to my insane decision of taking a couple servings of Castor Oil to throw myself into labor.
It seemed like I was in the hospital a week, but it was only about two and a half days. I’ll never forget it. When I went in, the trees were barren and winter-like. No leaves, no hint of anything. On the drive home from the hospital with our new baby, the trees were full of leaves. It was as though a new season had been born for her and her alone. For this reason, I will forever associate her with Springtime.
She was a happy baby – and a happy child. So many things about her are the same as when she was little. Her smile, her laugh, her loving ways – her beauty. She will be walking across the stage to graduate college in two short months. Four years of diligent hard work has paid off for her. She’s the kind of person who will be successful at whatever she does. I’m not saying this because she’s my daughter, that’s just how it’s always been.
Several months back I posted a poem that I wrote for my daughter when she was about 3 years old, found in a lost journal. She’s read it before, but I’m gonna post it again here. No other day more fitting than her birthday.
My Julia….
It seems so many years
Since the day when you were born
I’m blessed I feel, as I recall
there will come many more.
You’re more than I ever asked for
So innocent and true
Already my dreams are answered
If there’s nothing else you do.
Believe me, bug, that when I tell
My dreams of you to some
They know, as I, that you’ll succeed
That you’ve already won.
(2-27-92)
Weeks end
Dinner at the Japanese restaurant last night was fantastic. Not only was the food excellent, but as I’d wished we got a comedian for a chef. Even as young as he was, he was professional as well as entertaining. And, my daughter thought him cute “for a japanese guy”. I caught a cucumber in my mouth for the first time, my daughter caught one in her well-endowed rack, and my guy got a sake drench. 😀 My Mom and her hubby enjoyed theirselves too.
So it appears that I won’t be making a career out of writing happy birthday on cakes. It was hilariously illegible. Hey, it’s the thought that counts, right? And in this case – the taste. Which if I do say so myself, was delectable.
Everything is so green outside. It’s like looking at a picture where the artist decided to lightly dab bright green paint on the tips of the barren branches. Beautiful. New. Fresh. Welcomed.
Ah, breathe it in. While you can – because pollen season will be arriving soon.
I had to get on the big scale again at work today because I still didn’t believe yesterday’s reading. Of course it read the exact same – a teeter between 132.5–133… it still seems unreal to me. Although it’s going much slower than the 2008-2009 weight loss, it’s happening nonetheless. For that, and today being Friday, I am grateful.
We’re gonna try and get that picnic and hike in this weekend. So far we’ve been juggling ideas on where to go. I personally want to go as far as possible. ♥
Thought for the day... Thank God every morning when you get up that you have something to do that day which must be done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you temperance and self-control, diligence and strength of will, cheerfulness and content, and a hundred virtues which the idle never know.” ~Charles Kingsley
Life of Bon 
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