Sometimes…
I always enjoy conversations with my Dad. I can always depend on him to give me his honest opinion as well as a fresh male perspective on things, no matter how deep the subject matter. The other day he and I were in a discussion and he said something that really made me think. He told me, “sometimes you have to close one door in order to open another“. Now, there’s a world of difference between this saying and “when one door closes, another one opens”.
Case in point. A few posts back, I wrote ‘August first’ in which I described the one-year anniversary my boyfriend and I had, and some reflections I had of that year. In doing so, I also felt the need to clarify some ‘trying times’ that had occurred just a couple weeks prior to that. I told my Dad of this and why I felt this need to explain myself. Then he said it… “well, you know – sometimes you have to close one door in order to open another.” It makes a lot of sense if you think about it. I closely relate this little nugget of wisdom to ‘tending to unfinished business’ or ‘tying up loose ends’. I love wise sayings like this one which serves to ‘simplify life’ a little more… which I think we all could use more of.
Thanks, Dad.
The Picture
After a hearty Cracker Barrel breakfast on Sunday morning, K suggested driving down to the newest indoor fleamarket to walk some of the food off, to which I happily obliged.
There was no agenda, nor any certain thing we were looking for. The few times we’ve been to the place (ah, air-conditioning is a must) we’ve come away empty-handed – but it’s all good. K loves antiques, and is quite educated about them. Honestly, for me, it’s the walking around together and ‘discovering things’ with each other that matters so – it seems to go unsaid that he feels the same way. So we walk, hold hands and talk, and look… and happen upon it…
The print is entitled, Making Friends. The artist is Burton Dye, and the debut date was 1986. Same graduation year, and same high school… yes, yet more nostalgia.
K just finished remodeling his own bedroom, and in doing so moved into a larger room in his house. The color of paint he chose was a light to medium sort of periwinkle blue – it hints of blue, gray and lavender, and translates to airy and soothing. In combination with his dark furniture and just the right amount of beautiful sunlight the room gets, it was an exquisite choice.
Making Friends ~ ©Burton Dye 1986
Flashback to the picture. There it sat, amongst it’s competition, all of which were neatly lined along the floor of the vendor. Just like magnets, both of us were instantly drawn to this one. Print no. 1241 of 1900, it said – and it was very much in mint condition. Still in it’s original frame and matte, the wood frame has two tiny periwinkle blue pinstripes down all four sides that matches the matte – these were only visible up close.
The print is an image of a small boy with blonde hair, sitting along the shore of a riverbank to feed a flock of geese and goslings. The boy’s portrayal in the print is nothing less than that of pure innocence. I have yet to share my own perception of the art with K.
Shown is a young, innocent boy – soon to be in search of the finer things in life, which Capricorns are so noted for – but also appreciating the simple things. His love for animals is well-noted… as well as his love for the water – and fishing. The boy’s youth still leaves much to the imagination, such a large future lies ahead of him. With the comparable difference being light brown instead of blonde hair, I think the profile of this young lad so very closely coincides with that of K’s own childhood pictures. I think it’s fair to say this print has captured a piece of my heart for many years to come now…
To Mom
She said it herself about a week ago. ‘When she hurts, I hurt’. Well, my turn to say it now.
When she hurts, I hurt. My precious mother. I don’t want to get too technical on here for reason of privacy. But what I will say is that she’s been through way more than her share of hurt and heartache in her life. So much so, that I’m often amazed at the fact she hasn’t ever broken.
Yesterday was a birthdate of extreme significance to her. That in itself is always hard, when that time rolls around – as well as several other dates throughout the year.
Quite often I look at her strength, which she would probably argue the fact that she has, with much admiration. She has pushed through the hardest of times all while exuberating class and dignity. Not just part of the time… but all of the time.
She’s dedicated much time and patience in teaching her only child what it truly means to be a real southern lady. While I haven’t always been the best student, the old saying is true… you never stop learning.
So, Mom – know that you have an admirer out there. Though it’s for certain I’m not the only one – your baby girl will always be your number one fan.
Spoof Factor
What a beautiful weekend it’s been. Today K’s family is coming over to swim and cook out (his brother, sister, and their families). After that, I’ll have pretty much had my pool fix for a while.
Off to the grocery store since we exhausted what little supplies we had left yesterday. We’re even out of ketchup. No homemade anything by Bon today, there’s not enough time.
Yesterday was my clutz day. Ever have one of those days where everything you touch or make contact with results in some sort of accident or injury? That was my day yesterday. I’m hoping today will be different in that area – but since I’ve already stumped my toe at 9:30am, that hope is rapidly diminishing. Wish me luck – and remember, no news is good news.
Rest, Relaxation and Reality
I got a full night’s rest last night without waking up even once, until about 0830 this morning. My guy took me to see the movie Eclipse last night, what a great movie. No, I am not one of those over-40 women who gush over the boy stars (but umm, let me say there’s only one that I still consider a boy…) 🙂 I think what I love so much about the saga is it’s the perfect mix of action, drama and romance. And let’s face it, it’s unrealistic – so the Piscean in me basks in that dreamy part of it too. Anyway, I won’t spoil it for you – just to say if you haven’t yet seen it, it’s a must-see.
A day off, finally. What a joy to not have anything to do or anywhere to go. Pressing, that is. Time is at my own pace, and come what will. The weather is cooler, humidity is down, sun still shining, and hallelujah Praise God I’m off for three whole days. Even a simple trip to the grocery store and to tan was enjoyable this morning. Rode with the windows down and my hair blowing, just like it was spring again.
Now, if someone would just invent a Virtual Vacation to the beach, I’d be just peachy. Everyone I know is either en route there, or on the way back. I’m serious when I say everyone. Well, almost. Most of my friends on facebook are, my daughter is, my cousins are, I don’t need to go on. Guess I’ll be there one day soon, hopefully. My friend is getting married at the beach on August 22nd, so I’ll definitely be there on that day even if I have to drive down alone for that. She so deserves this most perfect day in her life and I’m so happy for her.
I do love fairytale endings… and they happen so rarely in Real Life. Hmmm, maybe the fairytale is what I love so much about the Twilight Saga. ♥
Bits and Pieces
I gazed down at myself as I sat down in my car seat this morning and discovered a spider had hitched a ride down the stairs with me. Lovely. I should be used to it by now I so hate spiders.
On a brighter note, here comes our holiday finally and with it the three-day weekend. Longer for some, I know, but I’ll take the extra day and not complain a bit. I recently made a friend who frequents the lake (via boat) and she invited us out this weekend. I’m SO STOKED I couldn’t be more excited if I were going to the beach. Wellll, I might be a bit more excited about that – but this is still major to me. I haven’t had a good day out on a boat in well, I don’t count last year because the boat never even moved from it’s stationery spot. So, three years now. That’s far too long for ole’ water-Bon to be a land-lubber. Craving the ocean too, but that’s a whole other story. The lake will most definitely temporarily suffice.
So, Eclipse has come out. All of my New Moon buddies have seen it so far and are telling me it’s mega-awesome, so I can’t wait to see it. My guy said something about Monday and it probably will be less crowded that day. One friend of mine was going to see it for the second time last night. The last movie I went to see more than once was Nights in Rodanthe, which I saw 3 times at the theatre. I didn’t know it at the time, but that movie was to become a staple in my newfound single life.
I have a friend who is taking his girlfriend to the beach this weekend – and planning to ‘pop the question’ to her. From what he said, she’s wanted this for a long time, and what better time than July 4th holiday? I’m such a romantic, so I bask in stories like these. I got all sappy yesterday when I heard what he was planning, and the girls at work were laughing at me. I can only explain it by saying that I’ve never in my life had anyone who actually wanted to marry me, so I guess that’ll make a person a romantic if nothing else will. I can’t wait to hear how he did it when he gets back in town… will he propose on the pier? On the beach? Or maybe at Broadway, standing underneath the fireworks after they start… my goodness, I love that idea….
Stay tuned. 🙂
Cry along
Although being a parent can be one of the most rewarding responsibilities in life, it’s also well-known to be the toughest.
Parenting. Everyone has their own idea of what it means, a mental list of what all it entails. There are no two sets of individual views that are exactly alike, because even if they possess similarities – the end result is always the same. Bottom line, God really does break the mold when he finishes making each and every one of us.
No matter how old they get, we as parents will never stop worrying about our children. As a young lady, I used to shrug that sentence off when my very own Mother would say it, usually throwing in the old eye-roll. I remember how I used to feel when I was young. As a young adult, I believed my parents either thought I wasn’t smart enough in my own decision-making, or I perceived them as trying to ‘rain on my parade’. Boy have I ever made some wrong choices in life that I’d been forewarned about. When I would fall down, there would be no “I told you so’s”. What happened then, when I fell? My Mother knelt down to me and cried along with me.
It’s hard when you see the wants in life overpowering the needs. I’m talking about the real needs. The Necessities. I was always told, ‘just worry about getting what you need… your wants will come later’. I still have a lot of wants, but that’s okay, I have most everything I need. The week-to-week struggle to maintain daily life definitely takes it’s toll sometimes – but I never forget to be thankful for a good job. Because of that, there is gas in my car and food in my belly. And by the Grace of God, a roof over my head.
Control is no longer an option. There comes a time when our babies wings are finally developed enough to soar the skies – we can’t and shouldn’t hold them back. But sincere advice, cordially delivered, is an option. And as a lifelong loving parent, a God-given right. I only pray for the realization of basic needs to overpower the wants. Any parent who genuinely loves their children only wants the best for them – for them to have sincere happiness, health and prosperity. As for what the future holds – if there ever is an instance of falling down… I will do the only thing that I’m able to do as a parent.
I will kneel down and cry along with them.
Dreamin’ again
I probably got 4 hours total last night, and that might be a stretch. Bad dreams don’t bother me so much, unless they’re mega-realistic. Last night’s was one of those.
We were meeting up with relatives for my daughter’s upcoming college graduation dinner. With the two sides of the family getting together again for the first in a very long time, it was already stressful. But then there was Mammaw – this is my grandmother who passed away almost a decade ago. She was standing beside Mom, looking beautiful, elegant. Actually everyone there looked their absolute best, the men in suits, women in dresses, makeup on point. But Mammaw looked ravishing, as she appears in most dreams I have of her. She was wearing a red and black dress. Mom had such a worried look on her face. She told me, ‘I think Mammaw just had a stroke again. All the symptoms are there, but she won’t even hear of going to the doctor’. Apparently she didn’t want to ruin Julia’s grad dinner. I then tried to talk her into going, telling her I’d take her myself right then. She never spoke to me, just had this dreamy far away look in her eyes. It brings me to tears to even recollect it. The dream ended there.
Boy do I miss her. She would have been the life of this ‘party’. Correction – Mammaw and my stepdad would’ve had to share the limelight on that one. Big O. It’s for sure this would’ve been one of his most proud moments – the ‘apple of his eye’ graduating college.
I know they’ll both accompany us in our spirit. But somehow… I think they’ll both be privy to see it as well. It’s just something that I feel.
Pressure’s on
My poor baby girl is so stressed right now, and I feel so bad for her. She has to submit a 15 to 20-page thesis as the last of her assignments before final exams (due Thursday) (tomorrow) and she’s really pushed the time limit on it. The very tightly-wound up little ball of stress came over yesterday and I cooked dinner for us, and halfway through dinner she was laughing and cutting up again. She told me about this party she went to that was primarily Latino, so after dinner we watched a stint of Katt Williams on Latinos – and ended up laughing our asses off. (Trust me, the Latinos were laughing their asses off too, he’s friggin hilarious.) It’s gotta be so tough having everything pile up right at graduation time, and although I haven’t been through that type of stress – I do understand it. She texted me at roughly 2:30am and again at 4:50am, still awake and unable to sleep. I wish I could do something to make it all easier, but isn’t that what we as parents always wish for?
My guy is taking her and I out for Japanese Thursday night and I’m looking forward to that. I told her it’ll be a celebration of sorts – hopefully by then a good portion of the weight will have been lifted and we’ll all enjoy ourselves. Gave her a wake-up call just a bit ago and she’s already in tears – hasn’t had any sleep and stress central. It’s literally ripping my heart out…
Life’s so hard sometimes. The old saying when it rains, it pours is really true. When shit goes down it seems to all go down at one time. Hang in there like I know you will, baby girl… you’ll get it done. And you’ll see it’ll all be worth it.
The Squirrel Whisperer
To some, squirrels are menacing little creatures who monopolize your bird seed and tear up your flowers by burying their nuts in your beds. I’ve seen people take drastic measures to reduce the squirrel population – including that of my own father-in-law. He used to set trap cages in his back yard, then take them on a 20-mile or so trek via car and release them to new territory. Somehow though, he always ended up with ‘new’ ones. lol
Well, they aren’t menacing to my Mother. She has this certain understanding and sense when it comes to them – this is why I call her The Squirrel Whisperer.
I don’t know when it all started, actually. She’s always loved animals, besides her pets I mean. That of the wild. Birds and bunny rabbits – and squirrels. I remember several years back when she called up on a early Saturday afternoon. “Something is in my fireplace” she said. I went over there, and during the course of the afternoon it became apparent that there sure WAS something in there. It was a squirrel – holding on tight doing a spread-eagle on the rounded flute!! It was the funniest most pathetic sight I ever did see. Fast-forward through many attempts to free the creature, to no avail. They ended up calling this rodent-control/removal service (that assured them they would do everything humanely possible to save the animal). To make an already long story short, you’d have thought the guy was killing the squirrel. Of all the screaming, it was terrible. All the sudden, one big YANK o’ the hook and here comes the soot-stained squirrel running out from the fireplace, straight out the storm door which we had propped open. Out he goes in true Christmas Vacation fashion, leaving Mom and I standing there – one of us holding a broom, and the other holding a blanket to shoo the squirrel towards the door like some wanna-be matador. We’ve laughed about this ‘rescue’ many times.
In her own back yard that I call little Utopia, therein resides a bird/squirrel/bunny sanctuary. Obviously all these animals talk to each other, because word has gotten out that this is THE backyard to come to. There are feeders, houses, birdbaths, little benches, flower gardens, and plenty of mature trees. If I was a bird or squirrel, I’d surely pick Mom’s back yard to live and I’ve told her so on many occasions. She just smiles.
Unfortunately Mom’s come in contact with some little orphans – in particular, one that she calls Junior. A couple of years back, there was an adult squirrel smashed out in the road. Not long after that there was a baby squirrel laying on a tree branch in her back yard, crying. Now if you’ve ever heard a squirrel cry, whether baby or adult, it’s heart-wrenching. It sounds just like a baby’s cry! Even though many things come naturally to an animal (building nests, flying, mating, hunting) a squirrel’s nest-building skills aren’t one of them. The little orphans are pretty much clueless as to how to build their home if they aren’t lessoned by a parent. After a little time, they’ll throw together a makeshift nest – though not carefully constructed enough to last. It usually always ends up back where it originated – the ground.
The first time Junior’s nest fell he was still a young lad, and he laid up on the branch and cried for a couple of days. After that he went a long stretch of time without a nest, and Mom worried about him so. Months later, he built again. Just last week after major storms, Junior’s mess of a nest was once again on the ground.
So what does his Mom do?
She gathers the nest up, puts it in a new wrought-iron basket and attaches it as high up in the tree as she can get it (barring a broken neck) near where he originally had it placed. This little squirrel loves his Mom. I see the way he looks at her when she takes pictures of him. Mom has told me when she pulls in the driveway, the little thing comes running from the back yard, up the driveway towards the car.
These little animals are lucky to have a Mom like her. And, I know how they feel. 🙂
Click here for Mom’s blog today.
Alpha Omega
It’s here, that time… it’s finally here. I’m holding in my hands the tickets to my little girl’s college commencement ceremony. Boy, no one could’ve made me believe that simply being handed the tickets would throw me in such an emotional state.
It seems like only yesterday we were moving her in her dorm. I can see her now running around in her Yankees Jeter jersey and 2 long pig-tail braids hanging down beneath her hat. It was hotter than 10 Haitis outside, and she and her roomie had packed enough between 3 cars and a large SUV to not only furnish the dorm room but an entire apartment.
Dorm move-in day, Aug. 17th 2006 – Julia on right, her roomie Lauren on left.
Since it was the first freshman move-in day, the campus was swamped with students and parents everywhere. Her roomie Lauren’s Dad, her Dad and I made countless trips back and forth from the parking lot to the dorm building in the extreme heat. After just a few trips, we noticed the girls were nowhere to be found. They were out being social butterflies while we were moving them in! As I look back, I remember arguing with her Dad about it. I know he remembers this, and we can actually laugh about it now. There at the end, when we were ringing wet and about to pass out from the heat, in bops Julia and Lauren with a couple of ‘cute’ strong lads they’d hooked up with to ‘help’ us. Those lads ended up getting the last load or two, and with us being at the passing-out point, we were ever-grateful.
Julia really is a rare find of a kid. From start to finish, her college education has totally been funded through her own student loans. It was to be a tenure that ended up surviving a series of curve balls – including the breakup of her parent’s marriage halfway through it. I’ve watched as countless friends of hers have either dropped out or otherwise were dismissed from college because of grades – but hers is a true success story. Over the last four years, I watched her worked her ass off for the education she knew she needed in life. She’s now earned this reward by much sweat of her brow – time, effort, and a lot of hard work. She’s always been the kind of girl that knows what she wants, and doesn’t mind working hard to get there.
I already know that the day in mid-May when she walks across the stage will be one of the most emotional days of my life. I could not be more proud of her, and I know for a fact her entire family is too.
Assets
It’s been a while since I’ve done it – dedicate a blog to count my many blessings. I’ve done enough bitching here recently about my taxes and a few other things, that I actually think I’m overdue on this blessing count.
First and foremost, for the Son Jesus – whom our Lord sent down to die for my countless sins so that I may be cleansed forevermore. I’m very much aware that I have a potty mouth more often than not, but I do know the Truth. I’ll just continue to work on my potty mouth.
I am thankful for the ride to work in the morning, and the sun and the spring. The many leaves that have filled in and shape the trees now, and all the green. Work… what on earth would I do without my job? Can’t even begin to imagine an answer for that one. My ever-faithful car, which has really been a low-maintenance rock of a car. Back home, I have a pantry and refrigerator both full of food. And drink. My small furbaby who loves me unconditionally – every day running to meet me at the door. When I pick her up, she buries her little head in my neck to show me just how far that unconditional love goes.
I’m blessed to have all the comforts I have in my home – my computer, my television, my cozy little kitchen with everything I could ever need at my fingertips. The ease – the ease of it all. The warm baths and hot showers. My exercise machine, my warm comfy bed. The sprawling balcony which overlooks the forest and has become my outdoor sanctuary, and all the living greenery that makes it my home. The clothes and accessories I wear, every toiletry I could ever need in my entire life is at my fingertips. And, I feel healthy.
I’m thankful for my family, and my circle of friends. I could never express how much I truly love and treasure them. My beautiful Mom and Dad who have taught me what love for our Lord really is. My beautiful daughter who has accomplished more in life than I ever thought humanly possible, and is still attacking life largely. And the beautiful man in my life that shows me daily how much he loves me, through his actions and words. I honestly cannot imagine my life without him in it now.
Blessings, countless blessings. Gotta list them out every so often – lest we dwell on the things in life that just don’t matter so much…
22 years ago
Doesn’t seem possible it could be that many years, but it is. My little girl is 22 today.
I often think back to the time before her birth. She was comfortable right where she was at, inside me. Originally scheduled to be a Pisces, she decided to stay put for three more weeks deeming her a headstrong Aries. I was desperate to see my new baby, which led to my insane decision of taking a couple servings of Castor Oil to throw myself into labor.
It seemed like I was in the hospital a week, but it was only about two and a half days. I’ll never forget it. When I went in, the trees were barren and winter-like. No leaves, no hint of anything. On the drive home from the hospital with our new baby, the trees were full of leaves. It was as though a new season had been born for her and her alone. For this reason, I will forever associate her with Springtime.
She was a happy baby – and a happy child. So many things about her are the same as when she was little. Her smile, her laugh, her loving ways – her beauty. She will be walking across the stage to graduate college in two short months. Four years of diligent hard work has paid off for her. She’s the kind of person who will be successful at whatever she does. I’m not saying this because she’s my daughter, that’s just how it’s always been.
Several months back I posted a poem that I wrote for my daughter when she was about 3 years old, found in a lost journal. She’s read it before, but I’m gonna post it again here. No other day more fitting than her birthday.
My Julia….
It seems so many years
Since the day when you were born
I’m blessed I feel, as I recall
there will come many more.
You’re more than I ever asked for
So innocent and true
Already my dreams are answered
If there’s nothing else you do.
Believe me, bug, that when I tell
My dreams of you to some
They know, as I, that you’ll succeed
That you’ve already won.
(2-27-92)
Remember When…
The song always gets to me. I think it does most people – well okay, maybe females are a little more susceptible. Guess it’s because whatever point it takes us back to was a time where we were blissful and happy – a particular time in our past that is no longer around. Remember the past?
Click here to play it in the background.
Where does the song take you? C’mon, I know you’ve heard it before. To what realm in your life do you find yourself being transported back to whenever you hear it? Childhood? A past love? Your children?
For me, it’s all of the above.
My childhood. The friends I had… the good times and memories of when everything was so much larger than me – and seemingly magical. My family played a very big part in my life. It was always made clear to me how much I was loved, and wanted.
Past love? Well, I can only speak of one… the one of my past life, my 20-year marriage. Things were so good for the first half, or more, which I think he’d agree. After so much had happened, time revealed that there was no possibility of mending the extensive amount of damage. Irreparable. Be ever-mindful of your words and your actions, my friends – for the old saying is true. You can NOT take these back.
My child. The biggest blessing of my life. I look back to see I that took for granted the devine granting of a child. I admit it. That sweet voice, I can still hear it. The pitter-patter of those little feet. The wonderful week-long vacations that we were able to take when she was younger, much thanks to my Mom and StepDad. Those loving hugs, a sweet-smelling angel holding on tight… never being the first to pull away. She’s an adult now, getting ready to graduate college in 2 months. I’m left with only memories of those young years. The most precious memories.
Most of all, it reminds me of how much of my life has gone by now – and how I’m starting over at this late age. Okay, maybe it’s not that late in life yet, but enough so that over half of it has already been lived. Somehow it all seems very surreal, even now. Funny how things in life change and evolve over time, without you realizing how significant the end result will be. And I realize now that sometimes, looking back is a part of life.
Remember when?
A quickie
42 today, I am. Happy Birthday to me. 🙂 I’ve had so many birthday wishes on facebook that it’s overwhelming to me. Makes a girl feel real good.
Not much to write about today – maybe it’s because I haven’t had my morning dose of news yet. Instead I’ll post a link to my Mother’s blog in which she made me the topic of today. I’m very blessed to have such a wonderful and talented Mother, and her blog for today actually made me cry when I read it.
The Ruin of the Village
As I travel to work this morning, it’s so peaceful. The long stretch of highway that still harbors undeveloped land is my serenity during the drive in. As I gaze at the car traveling ahead, I take note of the rhythmic falling of frozen snow from it’s body. It seems to align perfectly with the melodic voice of Gary LeVox in the background. Yeah. Peaceful.
And I think. And wonder. Why it is that certain people try so hard to ruin other’s peace.
Now, I realize the true definition of a Village Idiot does not correspond perfectly with the traits and characteristics of the person I am so describing here. But bear with me, if you will. I happen to think the term Village Idiot has a nice little jingle to it, so… that’s the moniker I choose for this individual.
The Village Idiot works very hard indeed. The Village Idiot will make it her life’s goal to create drama and manipulate others. The Village Idiot thrives on tension, hostility and mental anguish.
The Village Idiot proclaims to be a Christian, all while holding many years of hatred in her heart. She will use the word God and Jesus only when she feels it will be of true benefit to her. The icy heart of the Village Idiot will never be open to the truths and silent hells of others. To the Village Idiot, there is no ‘other side’ of the story, because it is her way or no way.
The Village Idiot is unable to hold her sharp tongue, for either enemies or loved ones, including her own children. Having cut and edited another person’s story in order to better accommodate her own drama-filled life, the Village Idiot is a professional story-teller.
The Village Idiot doesn’t have many friends, and unbeknownst to her, the few she has must walk on eggshells. The Village Idiot has on-again/off-again relationships with the majority of the people in her life. She is consistently on the outs with her family and friends.
The Village Idiot will express her views in a manner that displays her own true ignorance. She forms her opinions without ever attempting to check facts beforehand. Politics, religion, family life – the Village Idiot believes she knows it all, and wants others to believe it as well.
The Village Idiot blasts others for performing acts that she herself performs on a daily basis. There will be no reasoning with the Village Idiot, for reason itself does not exist within her brain. The Village Idiot will smile to your face, and her razor-sharp tongue begins to wag as soon as you walk away from her.
The Village Idiot will never be fully aware just how large of an ass she consistently makes of herself. How, in her absence, her own family and friends discuss her psychotic ways.
In my ever-continuing endeavor at aging gracefully, I find that my toleration factor for the Village Idiot has completely and totally disintegrated. And guess what? It’s one thing I have no desire to get back.
Bloodlines and Family Trees
Ever wonder about your own bloodline, and what little pieces of your heritage may have yet to be discovered?
My Mother has done quite a bit of tracking on her own family’s genealogy. She’s ran upon a lot of research done that ends up being quite informative and very interesting. Her paternal ancestry, the Jones’, traces all the way back to Wales, England. Her maternal ancestry, the McCorkles, hailed from Ireland. She has names and even pictures of some, as well as documented dates when certain ancestors came to America. I’ve never done research on my Father’s side, as there would be a large gap on one side in which it would be difficult to find certain information. Whatever the case may be, I feel certain there is no pot of gold at the end of my bloodline.
No matter how much information we’ve ‘gathered’ on our ancestors, we would be fools to believe it’s simply that cut-and-dry. Let’s be honest, there’s always going to be that one or more indiscretion that likely was swept under the rug. Sometimes things come out in the wash, sometimes they don’t. Unless one has strictly royal blood running through their veins, and can prove it – one cannot denounce the possibility of mixed bloodlines within their ancestry.
First Lady Michelle Obama even announced recently that she’d discovered caucasian in her bloodline, from the early slavery times. Her maternal third-great-grandfather was a white man, who fathered Melvinia Shields’ (her maternal third-great grandmother’s) son, Dolphus T. Shields, both of who were slaves.
Here’s a cold hard fact: According to population geneticist Mark Shriver at Morehouse College in Atlanta, GA, a full 58 percent of African-Americans possess at least 12.5 percent European ancestry (which again, is the equivalent of that one great-grandparent).
Bottom line – to anyone still naive enough to believe in the myth of racial purity, this is just one more corroboration that the social categories of ‘white’ and ‘black’ have always been more porous than can be imagined, especially when referring back to that nether world called slavery.
Of course, black and white seems to be the more prevalent bloodline mixture, being as how it was introduced in the days of slavery. But any real case can be made on this when it comes to past migration to the United States. Indian, Latin, English, African, Asian…. it all applies to the same – endless possibilities.
Something to think about this the next time you look in the mirror! This ‘mixed bag’ we have is now what makes up the United States of America. This is us.
Nada Subject
The possibility of winter precipitation exists for this Friday. Ha! I guess we’ll see. The weathermen are SO flying under the radar, which is usually the time we get slammed with a winter storm. I’ve gotta say, I wouldn’t mind it… especially because of the time frame, late Friday into Saturday. No missing any work! So my current plans for Friday are 1) grab my guy, 2) rent a couple movies and 3) lock ourselves indoors all weekend. Oh, and gotta make sure I’m stoked stocked on hot chocolate. 😛
I know this is totally off the subject (what subject?), but we were discussing at work how it really took no effort at all to accommodate the year change – both in writing and/or typing it. Why is this? Why does it take half the year to remember to write 2009 instead of 2008, yet you can go to a 2-digit year change with no problem? So I’ve been taking polls on this. The few people I’ve asked have had the same result…. made a successful switch to 2010 with no whiteout or backspace key needed! Wish I knew the reason for this.
Slowly, methodically, the clouds are rolling in…
Last night’s dinner with Mom went so well, and we enjoyed the time spent together. Good fellowship, good food, and as always lots of laughs. Little Camille was on cloud nine having everyone there making over her – she walked around looking lost after everyone left.
This may come as a big surprise, but I’m not even gonna comment on the Union speech last night. Yes, I did watch it, in it’s entirety. More empty promises, more of the thumb directed over his shoulder to indicate the administration prior to his that left the pile of shit for him to deal with, more of the worst is now over shpill, and why don’t we export more shit to create more jobs, shit that won’t sell anyway because American shit’s too expensive, yada yada. I will say…. Pelosi just needs to sit her ass down.
Well okay, I guess I did just comment on it.
So Elizabeth Edwards is finally leaving her lying cheating sleeze bag of a husband. Sad thing is, still suffering with terminal cancer, she can’t have that much time left. I pray that God gives her strength to get through what will likely be the hardest decision she’s ever made. I have great empathy for this woman, and the horrible embarrassment and shame she’s endured. As well, I feel for the innocent children that are involved.
Speaking of – funny, I read yesterday that 27 Jan was also the date that Hillary Clinton blamed Bill’s sexual indiscretions on “a vast right-wing conspiracy”. It’s true… it’s even made it’s way into her ‘memoir’. Profanity sits impatiently on the tip of my tongue right now, and works diligently to pry open my lips so that it may escape. Ladies, when are you going to stop blaming others for your husband’s indiscretions?? Okay – same goes for you guys if the roles are reversed!! This is NOT an act that you have to put up with or endure!! Even the Good Book, our Holy Bible, instructs us that marriage is indeed separable by two things: death AND ADULTRY!! Have we been conditioned to believe that it’s either warranted or expected of us to put up with such a damaging and intimate abuse of trust in a marriage? I don’t get it. I just don’t get it.
On a brighter note, it is one beautiful sunrise out there this morning….
Outside the window at work
27 January
My Mother’s birthday is today – and I’d like to wish her the happiest of birthdays. ♥ Without getting all nostalgic on ya, I’ve gotta say it doesn’t seem all that long ago when we were all “three” going out to eat somewhere for her birthday. All three being myself, her and my Grandmother (her Mother). There was always much laughter involved, because Mammaw loved to laugh and to make others laugh. And for her, that was an easily accomplished feat. I know my Mother misses her greatly, they say it’s never quite the same again when you lose your Mother. I am ever so grateful to have mine here with me still. Lord, once again, I thank you for assigning this woman to be my Mother.
I’m having her and her hubby over to eat tonight in my little humble abode. I do love to cook, now moreso than ever – and I hope it turns out to be an enjoyable meal for her. I’m looking forward to it.
Today is also a big day for someone else – my guy. He has a big court date today involving his divorce proceedings, and boy does it promise to be a very chaotic one. It ain’t gonna be pretty, and keeping all emotions in check will likely take much effort. Needless to say, he’ll be on my mind all day. With all the hell he’s been through, I can think of no one else who deserves a fair outcome.
Once upon a time, life held promise of being perfect. Everyone, everything and every place was full of glory. There was no death. There were no lying cheating spouses. There was no sickness. The word pain had yet to be invented.
Then Eve bit that damned apple.
More birthday bang
Had a nice evening yesterday. As I mentioned before, my boyfriend, his sister and his brother all have birthdays within a week of each other, he and his brothers being on the same day. We went out to Outback last night to celebrate all three.
Good fellowship and a lot of laughter was involved. There’s a lot to be said for having little to zero drama in one’s family. Okay, I know there’s no such thing as NO drama with a family, but at least I realize now you can get pretty damn close. I guess what I was used to dealing with in the past makes me appreciate this more than the average person. Bottom line, I just prefer not being in the position of worrying about if a loose cannon is gonna blow, or taking those hidden right hooks while remaining silent out of respect. It’s pretty simple, really – and I like things simple and non-chaotic.
The staff at Outback really went out of their way to accommodate us, especially when they learned of three siblings at the table that were there to celebrate their birthdays. Upon finishing our meals (and with the birthday boys and girl each having a celebratory Patrone double tequila shot) the waiter came back to take the plates. My guy’s brother’s wife suggested that instead of the birthday dessert they were scheduled to bring out, why don’t they switch it up and bring them out a birthday tequila shot. We really didn’t think they would go along with it, but hey, you can ask, right? Up next came the manager of the restaurant with shots for all of them on a tray – so funny!! THAT’S called pleasing your patrons. It’s also what brings them return visits, and here’s a place that actually recognizes that.
Life of Bon 
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