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I’ve written about second chances more than one time, so you’re likely already aware of my deep appreciation of them. The dear fella by the name of Shawn B. over at Happy Publishing frequently brightens the days of many with his website dedicated to inspirational quotations and poems. The one posted yesterday captured my attention, and heart.

The following was posted January 17, 2001 on www.happypublishing.com. Feel free to check the site out if you get a chance…

The Second Chance

We may not have the means at hand
To change a circumstance.
But we may gain, to our relief,
A welcome second chance–

A chance to prove that we will try,
With all our might and main,
To change our ways, to right some wrong,
And pull our weight again.

So let us thank the generous folk
Who overlook our lapse,
And put their trust in our success,
Where once we failed, perhaps.

The second chance can bright results
The first one to outweigh,
For in the meantime we have learned
A little more each day.

-Anna Hayward

Declutter thyself 2011

Up until now it’s been my ‘silent’ New Year’s resolution. Back when I moved in mid ’08, I was probably the most de-cluttered I’d ever been in my life. Since then – well, let’s just say I’m no hoarder or anything like you see on television, but things have slowly been building back up. I can’t stand it, and it certainly doesn’t take long for it to happen.

I’ve always heard that if you don’t use something a year after boxing it up, you can toss it (aside from certain memorabilia of course… which, if taken to extremes could still lead to hoarding).

So.

My plan of action is to tackle one area at a time, one thing at a time. Now all I need is some Tacklin’ Fuel to do it with (said using my best New Orleans accent of The Waterboy, Mr. Bobby Boucher). Yes, yes. Tacklin’ Fuel. Now, to find that fuel…

Born-on date

Is today for my sweet guy, Keith. Happy Birthday, baby! I hope you enjoy your special day, and the year ahead is all you wish it to be and much more. You truly deserve it.

The sixties… it seems so long ago, but yet not so long ago. Sure, we can’t really remember that era as children of the seventies, but we still remember all the hype. A lot of it we heard about from our parents, you could always depend on the media’s skewed views, and anything left we were taught in history class. The protests, the demonstrations, the assassinations, the Vietnam war, the flower power.

The seventies, now that’s really where it all began. Friends, bikes, and spending most of your time outside. Jimi Hendrix. All in the Family. Watergate. Hee Haw. You still remember your surroundings when you heard Elvis Presley died. Disco music. KISS.

I won’t go into the rest of the decades, as I could only document my own. Unbeknownst to us at the time, during the eighties we came together briefly by being classmates of the same graduating year. How I really wish I’d known you then, but then again, timing is everything….

To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven:

A time to be born,
and a time to die;
a time to plant,
and a time to pluck up
that which is planted;

A time to kill,
and a time to heal;
a time to break down,
and a time to build up;

A time to weep,
and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn,
and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones,
and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace,
and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get,
and a time to lose;
a time to keep,
and a time to cast away;

A time to rend,
and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence,
and a time to speak;

A time to love,
and a time to hate;
a time of war;
and a time of peace.

The Holy Bible (King James Version) 
Attributed to King Solomon
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Icing on the cake

And that’s sure what it was. The icing came all during the day yesterday from late afternoon on into the night. When all was said and done, about three-eighths of an inch of bonified icing topped our lovely vanilla snow cake. I am eternally thankful we never lost power.

It’s going on mid-week now, and I have yet to go to work. I realized today that my car wasn’t going to de-ice itself, neither was the driveway going to shovel itself. So we dressed, went outside and made a big show of it, huffing and puffing and sliding/sweating our little buns off – to start and finish a job we didn’t really want to do. Seeing as how the temps aren’t supposed to rise above freezing until Friday-ish, I needed to get my tail in gear and do what I had to do to get home. You see, my little treehouse is situated privately in the very back of a complex that can be tricky at best in ice – but once I get out of there, I’m on a main thoroughfare. In going back to work, there was no way I was getting out of Keith’s neighborhood any time before noon. So, I had to get home.

I really don’t mean to drill this ‘Southern’ thing into the ground when it comes to us driving, but… okay just one more time. Have I told you we just can’t drive in the stuff? Snow is bad enough, but go and add over a quarter-inch of ice over it? Impossible. Through country back-roads that have no hope of ever being scraped/brimed? Inconceivable. But, guess who did it and made the ten-mile trip back home? (And, might I add, *cough-cough* you-tubed a portion of it?)

ME! (If anyone ever had doubt as to my southern-ness before, please refer to that accent – my gosh. I’ve obviously been here awhile now.)

Okay, enough with the bragging. For those who wonder, Keith was insistent on at least following me – I just saw no logic in it. After several failed attempts at convincing me, I finally convinced him that I had a cell phone and that signals had always been plentiful through the area, with the exception of a certain spot. But hey, I also had my new snow boots on! So, Da da da-DAH da-DAH!! It’ssss Super–Bonnnn!!

Top left, a Snow-Angel named Keith; top right, icicles hanging from the roof; bottom left, a few minutes into de-icing the 'windsled'; bottom right, me cheesing in (are those really bedroom slippers??) in the snow. Don't ask where the new boots are – I have no idea.

Well, I hadn’t been at home very long at all when a crave-wave winded it’s way into my head and wafted right down to where I could literally smell it.

Chinese… take-out… mmm, good good… come and get me…

I tried to ignore it, really I tried… to no avail. Moments later I was back on the road on a Chinese food quest. I found it so weird that there was no 5 o’clock rush-hour traffic. I mean NONE. I did mention, didn’t I, that the ice and snow brought this city to a screeching halt?

So here it is, my fortune for the date 1-11-11. A very befitting one, I think, considering my day…

Guess this whole ‘I can drive now’ thing means one thing – I gotta go back to work tomorrow…

Winter wonderland

“Baby… it’s white outside”, I woke up to Keith whispering in my ear about 4am this morning. Sure enough, the ground was covered – as much of the south is today. It’s been an unusual winter so far in the south in terms of snowfall. The next few hours were spent pulling up dopplar radars on our phones and contacting the necessary bosses to advise them we weren’t coming in.

As long as Keith and I have been together and through several snows, we’ve never been together during a snow. So instead of packing up and going home yesterday, I went and gathered some extra clothes and opted to stay at his house. Being the sweetie he is, he even took me to the store and bought me some boots to walk in the snow in (it’s tough getting around in the white stuff  in tennis-shoes). We loaded up on the needed goods including another feeder and more sunflower seed for the birds, which they’ve been going nuts over this morning. Camille’s been so enthralled with the birds, that like a little kid she won’t even take a nap. In typical southern fashion, the snow has pretty much crippled the city and surrounding areas.

But it’s soooo pretty. 🙂

Camille scored her a new bed Friday, which would’ve normally taken a few weeks for her to break down and get in. For some unknown reason, she took right to this one! Maybe it’s the color fashion that so closely corresponds with her own.

Or maybe it was the fire.

Thirteen years ago

Every January 6th, many memories come flooding back of you, my dear deceased stepdad.

They called you Big O. You were a sailor, businessman, trucker, husband, dad, pawpaw, and friend. I’m not the only one these memories revisit so very often, there are of course others – your wife, your granddaughter, son-in-law and all of your children and grandchildren alike.

You were a man like no other; generous, loving and strong. You see, God really did break the mold when he made you. I’ve never seen a person who loved people in general so much – you just never met a stranger. Nothing pleased you more than to make someone laugh or smile. You were known to go up and put a strong arm around an unknown and give them a jovial ‘shake’ when you thought they might be having a bad day. Only once in a while would it make the person uncomfortable, but I like to think it made the day better for most.

My, how you loved Dale Earnhardt Sr. – and to say you were passionate about your racing was an understatement. At the time, the infamous Daytona 500 was the one big win that had always eluded your driver – and of course you always took a lot of heat for this. I want you to know the following month after you died, Earnhardt drove his car to victory in his very first Daytona 500 win. It was a very emotional day down here to say the least – but a bright spot nonetheless. Sadly, three years later Earnhardt lost his own life in turn 4 at that very track. There wasn’t any bigger fan of Earnhardt as was you. You and he even looked so much alike it was uncanny – I like to think you’ve both met up by now. I can just see you walking together… with your hand on Earnhardt’s shoulder, telling him your stories.

Many different occasions you’d see a girl or lady with their midriff showing, perhaps even bearing a belly-ring. I remember how you loved that opportunity to go up to these females, put an arm around them and say in your southern drawl “I’ll bet that you like sailors, don’t ya?” I can’t remember a time where the female didn’t look stunned, finally responding with a grin and a “Why?” to which you would say “Because you’re showing off your naval base!!”. You’d always laugh heartily and  then flash that big Earnhardt smile. Actually, it was Earnhardt that had your smile. 🙂

I could write page after page about your character and the huge impact you had on not only my life but virtually everyone you came into contact with… but it would be further emotionally draining today and… long. I believe, though, that somehow you had an idea of how much everyone loved you. Your guidance, perseverance and faith in me greatly shaped my character. And, you would be so proud of the relationship I have with both my mom and dad today.

That fateful January 6th day of ’98 was to be your last. You had a massive heart attack that morning and went to be with Jesus. I have no doubt in my mind that’s where you are now… not a single doubt.

On the 13th anniversary of your sunset Big O, know that you’re still missed just as terribly today as you were in those moments right after your departure. So enjoy yourself up there, tell Mammaw hey for me – and we’ll being seeing ya…

Here’s to my health, and all that.

I’ve had much rest this past holiday season. The joy has been tremendous and the stress very minimal. However, even a beautiful post-holiday beach vacation to bring in the New Year isn’t enough to keep the blood pressure level in check for ole’ Bon. Apparently the second med that was added a couple of weeks ago was an Epic Fail. In lieu of waiting for that one month follow-up visit, I called Doc up yesterday morning. After another failed attempt on acquiring correct triage information between 4-5 phone conversations throughout the day, the last of the conversations went something like this.

Medical Assistant: Dr. Yadada has faxed in a new prescription that’s waiting for you at Your-Pharmacy, USA – you are to immediately quit your current bp meds and replace with this new ‘combination’ prescription.

Bon: What, a combination? So he said to cease taking the blah-blah? Wait – does this new ‘combination’ rx contain a beta-blocker, like the blah-blah I’ve been on for thirteen years?

Medical Assistant: I’m not sure.

Bon: I don’t think Dr. Yadada would just pull me off a beta-blocker which I’ve been on for thirteen years that’s pertinent to my survival. Just the last visit, he told me I’ll be on this one for the rest of my life. Think you could double-check with him?

Medical Assistant: Hmm… from what he said I’m thinking he meant come off of all your prior bp meds and immediately replace with this new one that’s a combo.

Bon: *Shock* Well, what’s the name of it, I’ll see if I can look it up.

Medical Assistant: I don’t really (really??) have access to that, as I don’t work in clinical.

(NOTE: ‘I don’t work in clinical’ most likely translates to ‘I don’t know what the f**k I’m talking about medically’. The title Medical Assistant assigned to her by yours truly is more than likely a very generous title.)

Bon: Look lady. One day off the beta-blocker could literally mean a stroke or worse for me. This is my LIFE we’re talking about here. I don’t want to hear what ‘you’re thinking’. I want to know what HE’S thinking.

Medical Assistant: Okay Ms. (cough-cough) Bitch, I’ll see if I can reach him again and verify if not all, which rx you are to replace with the new one.

You can probably guess the outcome. I was to remain on my beta-blocker and the new ‘combination’ one was once again an addition. It took the remainder of the day for me to calm down from this little ditty. With competent souls like this getting paid to look after your healthfare, will someone please tell me who the heck needs enemies?

New Year, New Beginnings… Part II

2010… it’s hard to believe it’s already over! Once again, it’s time for me make my year-end picks. I must pick my word of the year, and a meaningful new banner picture – something that I can look at for an entire year without getting sick of it. For those of you who missed it last year, here’s the link to New Year, New Beginnings Part I.

Even after a full year of looking at my banner pic, I’m sad to see it go. The below collage was made from all things I love, and I think the visual description alone pretty much says it all. Five little things at a glance that describe me.

Banner picture for 2010

For every year since the start of my ‘new life’, I’ve donned a single word that seems to most closely correspond with what that year meant to me. This whole word thing started pretty innocently in 2008, when I reflected back and chose the word Monumental. 2008 was the year I grew a backbone, or I’d like to think part of one – and walked that plank in search of a new life. The word I chose for 2009 was Colorful. 2009 was the year of mistakes growing for me. The chance to experience many, many firsts and new things, as well as learning truckloads about my own self.

On to my word of 2010. Drum Roll Please…

Serene. Isn’t that nice? I even like the way it looks. True, it doesn’t pack a punch like Monumental does. It doesn’t make the mind wonder what the hell I’ve been up to like Colorful does. It’s simple. The way my year was. Simple, easy… predictable. And, predictable can be a very good thing.

There’s also something else – something I honestly hadn’t contemplated until after I’d already chosen my word. As a young girl, I decided I didn’t like my name. My fix was, much to my Mother’s chagrin, ‘changing’ it to one of my own choosing. My choice was Serena. I was often asked ‘oh you mean Selena?’ ‘No’, I would say, ‘Serena.’ I could never explain exactly why I loved this name, and I even used it as my own signature until a teacher told me I couldn’t do it anymore. I was crushed! Such a beautiful name that was just slightly beyond my reach. Of course I grew out of this ‘phase’, but even in reflecting back, I remember how good the name made me feel when I used it as my own. (I also used to go around with a bright yellow turtleneck attached to my head, pretending I had long flowing blonde hair… but that’s another story. I blame all that on the Barbies.)

I like to think that after this year… I’ve finally found myself. Because, I actually feel ‘Serene’.

I believe I’ve finally found Serena.

I’d like to wish a Happy New Year to all of you. May it be a year of good health, prosperity, peace and unity for us all – God bless.

Define IRONY…

Well, actually it came by way of the 5 o’clock news this evening.

There’s a strangeness that no one can quite put their finger on. In a suburb right outside of my lovely town, a little girl was photographed. By a stranger. Playing in the snow. Zipped up tight to her nose in fluffy coatings and wintry garb. That’s right folks, a picture was taken.

Let me say first, I’m not trying to make light of any sort of potentially dangerous situation, particularly that which involves a child. But I’ve gotta say, there are some things with this ‘story’ that just don’t jive well with me.

The story as told by an 8-year old girl starts with her playing down the street from her house, and looking up to see a man taking a snapshot of ‘her’. She ran home to tell her mother. Mom is then broadcast all over the evening news rolling her eyes and saying “the thought of a sick, perverted man having a picture of my daughter infuriates me”. Every. Ten. Minutes. Well yeah lady, I have a daughter. That particular thought would infuriate me too.

But.

Let’s say for the sake of argument – there was this man going down the road with his wife driving (the little girl reported he was in the passenger seat – with no description of the driver) who decided to take a few rare southern snow pics, like I had the urge to do my own self today. The little girl (or other children) just happened to be in the general vicinity of where the camera was faced. Hell, it’s happened to me many times – I’ve just never been ‘accused’ of anything. But then again… I’m female. Hey, somebody had to say it…

Through many years of photography, I of course have my own photo library. Rather than a subject who happens to be laced, zipped and velcroed all the way up to their nostrils in the dead of winter – I’m quite sure a few of mine are on a public beach (Gasp**) in bathing suits! Certainly they weren’t the intended subjects of the frame – but what if they had been? This is what it’s come to. Yes, this. Here and now.

I must give credit to my Dad and his eagle-eye on this subject, as it was he who called and brought me up to speed on the said situation-at-hand. Yes, it’s pretty bad when you can’t be your normal self anymore. To be forced to avoid situations we’ve not only been accustomed to all our lives but have been raised to admire, respect and enjoy. Now we have to worry about staring a little too long, if at all… whether anything we say might be perceived as a prelude to an abduction… not to mention the subjects that might happen to be in the general vicinity of our cameras… need I even go on? And if you don’t worry about it… well you’d better worry about it. I don’t wish to downplay the possibility of a legitimate threat on this particular story. What I wish to up-play is the fact that we can’t snapshot a timeless moment anymore, without the fear of consequences.

Because this is where we are.

But Bon, where on earth is this irony you speak of? You really mucked this title up – wayyy off!!

Here we go, folks. In between sessions of Mom rolling her eyes and speaking of Joe Pedophile staring at photos of her little girl – a lighter, more airy segment flashed up where us viewers got the chance to see submitted photos of the snow aired on tonight’s edition of the local news. How sweet and funny they were, too – most submitted anonymously. Anything from snowmen, to sledding, to children playing, to pets playing, to…. hey BACK UP just a minute. Did you just say children playing????

IMHO the persons behind each of these two segments had to be on two different wavelengths, in two different buildings. In two different cities. With no communication tools. Ahem, you get my drift. Speaking of drifts…

Just be careful where and what you point those cameras at.

Story as seen on WBTV news

A White Christmas for the southeast

Really, Charlotte… snow??  Yes!! We actually got our white Christmas after all!!

Imagine that.

According to National Weather Service statistics, the Charlotte area hasn’t seen the likes of a white Christmas in 63 years. Since the NTS doesn’t count anything below an inch on the ground Christmas day as a ‘white Christmas’, 1947 was the last recorded date of snowfall on Christmas – which totalled around 5.5 inches on that day.

View from my third-floor treehouse this morning.

The forecast has made headlines for days now. Not just us, but many of the southeast area states of the US did in fact receive a packet or more of snowfall for Christmas this year. Our such packet didn’t arrive until after sunset last night, but it came nonetheless – and it’s still coming! Heck, it’s still snowing in Georgia this morning, and it was snowing in Myrtle Beach around 7am. It’s funny though… there doesn’t seem to be any bad roads out in the immediate vicinity. The accident rate is low so far, and the parking lots and roads look clear. It’s almost as though God brought us lovely snowfall that we can enjoy and get around well in. What a blessing!

My balcony got a little snow as well. So far my geranium, fern and palm tree don’t mind a bit!

This morning I was reading the probability ratings for various cities across the US (as well as different parts of the world) on the ‘probability’ of snow on Christmas. I found it hilarious that Charlotte, NC ranks right alongside Los Angeles, CA and Phoenix, AZ – all three sporting a whopping 1% probability rating. I heart Wikipedia (umm, except for that leakage thing)… so go ahead, see if your city is on the list and what it ranks. Wiki factoids and probabilities for a White Christmas in your city

Where I usually type my little blog… this morning I very much enjoyed a memorable wintry view.

It’s funny to see all the facebook statuses and pictures posted last night and into today from friends and family. The snow seems to have lifted spirits everywhere, especially households with small children who enjoy getting out and playing in it. Snow on Christmas has just put a whole different ‘air’ out, so to speak. Lighter, brighter and more joyful souls abound everywhere… dare I say, I can almost feel a renewed sense of hope for the new year to come? Whatever the case may be… it is very refreshing.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas…

Away in a manger, no crib for a bed
The little Lord Jesus laid down His sweet head

The stars in the bright sky looked down where He lay
The little Lord Jesus asleep on the hay

The cattle are lowing, the poor Baby wakes
But little Lord Jesus, no crying He makes

I love Thee, Lord Jesus, look down from the sky
And stay by my side ’til morning is nigh.

Be near me, Lord Jesus, I ask Thee to stay
Close by me forever and love me I pray

Bless all the dear children in Thy tender care
And take us to heaven to live with Thee there

No, I didn’t write it. But how tender a person that did! It all but takes you right up ON that manger, doesn’t it? An almost secret view, if you will. My most favorite Christmas hymn has always been O Holy Night… but the lyrics to Away in a Manger are probably the most meaningful to me of all the Christmas hymns.

This year I hope Christmas brings peace, tranquility and much love into the souls of us all. May everyone enjoy and appreciate good family and friends. May we all secretly do one special thing for another this year and sit back and contemplate the smile it might bring. May any sadness that exists within your heart be overridden with joy. May everyone share an abundantly overflowing cup of love this Christmas.

And above all… always remember that little baby who started out laying in a manger.
The One who started…

Christmas.

A Real Country Christmas

I received the below story via email this morning. The preface warned that the story was a little on the long side, and it is – but a great read nonetheless. I found the story not only moved me to tears, but more than worthy of posting as a blog subject. Hope you all enjoy.

Now this is what a country Christmas is all about…

Pa never had much compassion for the lazy or those who squandered their means and then never had enough for the necessities.  But for those who were genuinely in need, his heart was as big as all outdoors.  It was from him that I learned the greatest joy in life comes from giving, not from receiving.

It was Christmas Eve.  I was fifteen years old and feeling like the world had caved in on me because there just hadn’t been enough money to buy me the rifle that I’d wanted for Christmas.  We did the  chores early that night for some reason.  I just figured Pa wanted a little extra time so we could read in the Bible.

After supper was over I took my boots off and stretched out in front of the fireplace and waited for Pa to get down the old Bible.  I was still feeling sorry for myself and, to be honest, I wasn’t in much of a mood to read Scriptures. But Pa didn’t get the Bible, instead he bundled up again and went outside. I couldn’t figure it out because we had already done all the chores. I didn’t worry about it long though, I was too busy wallowing in self-pity.

Soon Pa came back in.  It was a cold clear night out and there was ice in his beard. “Come on, Matt,” he said. “Bundle up good, it’s cold out tonight.”  I was really upset then. Not only wasn’t I getting the rifle for Christmas, now Pa was dragging me out in the cold, and for no earthly reason that I could see.  We’d already done all the chores, and I couldn’t think of anything else that needed doing, especially not on a night like this.  But I knew Pa was not very patient at one dragging one’s feet when he’d told them to do something, so I got up and put my boots back on and got my cap, coat, and mittens.  Ma gave me a mysterious smile as I opened the door to leave the house.  Something was up, but I didn’t know what.

Outside, I became even more dismayed. There in front of the house was the work team, already hitched to the big sled. Whatever it was we were going to do wasn’t going to be a short, quick, little job.  I could tell. We never hitched up this sled unless we were going to haul a big load.  Pa was already up on the seat, reins in hand.  I reluctantly climbed up beside him. The cold was already biting at me.  I wasn’t happy.  When I was on, Pa pulled the sled  around the house and stopped in front of the woodshed.  He got off and I followed. “I think we’ll put on the high sideboards,” he said.  “Here, help me.”  The high sideboards!  It had been a bigger job than I wanted to do with just the low sideboards on, but whatever  it was we were going to do would be a lot bigger with the high side boards on.

After we had exchanged the sideboards, Pa went into the woodshed and came out with an armload of wood – the wood I’d spent all summer hauling down from the mountain, and then all fall sawing into blocks and splitting. What was he doing?  Finally I asked.  “Pa, what are you doing?”  “You been by the Widow Jensen’s lately?” he asked.  The Widow Jensen lived about two miles down the road.  Her husband had died a year or so before and left her with three children, the oldest being eight.  Sure, I’d been by, but so what?  Yeah,” I said, “Why?”

“I rode by just today,” Pa said. “Little Jakey was out digging around in the woodpile trying to find a few chips. They’re out of wood, Matt.”  That was all he said and then he turned and went back into  the woodshed for another armload of wood.  I followed him.  We loaded the sled so high that I began to wonder if the horses would be able to pull it.  Finally, Pa called a halt to our loading, then we went to the smoke house and Pa took down a big ham and a side of bacon.  He handed them to me and told me to put them in the sled and wait.  When he returned he was carrying a sack of flour over his right shoulder and a smaller sack of something in his left hand.  “What’s in the little sack?” I asked.  “Shoes, they’re out of shoes.  Little Jakey just had gunny sacks wrapped around his feet when he was out in the woodpile this morning.  I got the children a little candy too.  It just wouldn’t be Christmas without a  little candy.”

We rode the two miles to Widow Jensen’s pretty much in silence.  I tried to think through what Pa was doing.  We didn’t have much by worldly standards.  Of course, we did have a big woodpile, though most  of what was left now was still in the form of logs that I would have to saw into blocks and split before we could use it.  We also had meat and flour, so we could spare that, but I knew we didn’t have any money, so why was Pa buying them shoes and candy?  Really, why was he doing any of this?  Widow Jensen had closer neighbors than us; it shouldn’t have been our concern.

We came in from the blind side of the Jensen house and unloaded the wood as quietly as possible, then we took the meat and flour and shoes to the door.  We knocked.  The door opened a crack and a timid voice said,  “Who is it?”

“Lucas Miles, Ma’am, and my son, Matt, could we come in for a bit?”  Widow Jensen opened the door and let us in.  She had a blanket wrapped around her shoulders.  The children were wrapped in another and were sitting in front of the fireplace by a very small fire that hardly  gave off any heat at all.  Widow Jensen fumbled with a match and finally lit the lamp.

“We brought you a few things, Ma’am,” Pa said and set down the sack of flour.  I put the meat on the table.  Then Pa handed her the sack that had the shoes in it.  She opened it hesitantly and took the shoes out one pair at a time.  There was a pair for her and one for each of the children – sturdy shoes, the best – shoes that would last.  I watched her carefully.  She bit her lower lip to keep it from trembling and then tears filled her eyes and started  running down her cheeks.  She looked up at Pa like she wanted to say something, but it wouldn’t come out.

“We brought a load of wood too, Ma’am,” Pa said.  He turned to me and said, “Matt, go bring in enough to last awhile.  Let’s get that fire up to size and heat this place up.” I wasn’t the same person when I went back out to bring in the wood.  I had a big lump in my throat and as much as I hate to admit it, there were tears in my eyes too.  In my mind I kept seeing those three kids huddled around the fireplace and their mother standing there with tears running down her cheeks with so much gratitude in her heart that she couldn’t speak.  My heart swelled within me and a joy that I’d never known before filled my soul.  I had given at Christmas many times before, but never when it had made so much difference.  I could see we were literally  saving the lives of these people.

I soon had the fire blazing and everyone’s spirits soared.  The kids started giggling when Pa handed them each a piece of candy and Widow Jensen looked on with a smile that probably hadn’t crossed her face for a long time.  She finally turned to us. “God bless you,” she said. “I know the Lord has sent you.  The children and I have been praying that he would send one of his angels to spare us.”

In spite of myself, the lump returned to my throat and the tears welled up in my eyes again.  I’d never thought of Pa in those exact terms before, but after Widow Jensen mentioned it I could see that it was probably true.  I was sure that a better man than Pa had never walked the earth.  I started remembering all the times he had gone out of his way for Ma and me, and many others.  The list seemed endless as I thought on it.

Pa insisted that everyone try on the shoes before we left.  I was amazed when they all fit and I wondered how he had known what sizes to get.  Then I guessed that if he was on an errand for the Lord that the Lord would make sure he got the right sizes.

Tears were running down Widow Jensen’s face again when we stood up to leave.  Pa took each of the kids in his big arms and gave them a hug.  They clung to him and didn’t want us to go.  I could see that they missed their Pa, and I was glad that I still had mine.

At the door Pa turned to Widow Jensen and said, “The Mrs. wanted me to invite you and the children over for Christmas dinner tomorrow.  The turkey will be more than the three of us can eat, and a man can get cantankerous if he has to eat turkey for too many meals.  We’ll be by to get you about eleven.  It’ll be nice to have some little ones around again. Matt, here, hasn’t been little for quite a spell.”  I was the youngest.  My two brothers and two sisters  had all married and had moved away.

Widow Jensen nodded and said, “Thank you, Brother Miles.  I don’t have to say, May the Lord bless you; I know for certain that He will.”

Out on the sled I felt a warmth that came from deep within and I didn’t even notice the cold.  When we had gone a ways, Pa turned to me and said, “Matt, I want you to know something.  Your ma and me have  been tucking a little money away here and there all year so we could buy that rifle for you, but we didn’t have quite enough. Then yesterday a man who owed me a little money from years back came by to make things square.  Your ma and me were real excited, thinking that now we could get you that rifle, and I started into town this morning to do just that, but on the way I saw little Jakey out scratching in the woodpile with his feet wrapped in those gunny sacks and I knew what I had to do.  Son, I spent the money for shoes and a little candy for those children. I hope you understand.”

I understood, and my eyes became wet with tears again.  I understood very well, and I was so glad Pa had done it.  Now the rifle seemed very low on my list of priorities.  Pa had given me a lot more.  He had given me the look on Widow Jensen’s face and the radiant smiles of her three children.

For the rest of my life, whenever I saw any of the Jensens, or split a block of wood, I remembered, and remembering brought back that same joy I felt riding home beside Pa that night. Pa had given me much more than a rifle that night, he had given me the best and most memorable Christmas of my life.

My wish for you all is to have a real country Christmas!  It is, after all, what we do for others that makes CHRISTmas such a wonderful blessing…

Christmas Memories

I watched a special on 60 minutes Sunday night called ‘The Gift of Endless Memory’ detailing rare cases of persons that can literally remember every single day of their life since their memory started registering. The medical term given is Superior Autobiographical Memory. I, along with others who watched it, found the story fascinating.

My own memory is nothing of the sort, of course. That said, it is that time of year when certain memories of Christmases past will pop in and out, some being stronger than others.

Like my uncle giving me a pair of black patent leather lace-up boots, oh how I loved those boots – I was no more than five. Another Christmas and uncle presenting me with a stuffed dog that was just as tall as I was at the time. Riding in the cold on my new bicycle, complete with new front basket with faux flowers. Our dog Archie running wild through the house with a red bow on his head – on the one day a year that he was allowed inside briefly, Christmas Eve. Opening a gigantic box from Mom, thrilled to find it filled to the brim with new books. My cousins as babies, each sporting a little bald head at the time in their adorable Christmas outfits. My mammaw and our calico kitty, Skitz – her touching each of her paws and saying ‘you just don’t match’. Baby girl sitting in her little black corvette with an upside-down smile, frustrated with sidewalk driving at the early age of 3. Bountiful meals and family time at Nanny’s and Nana’s houses. Baby girl walking into a sliding glass door thinking it was open, landing her smack on the floor. Mammaw being barely able to breathe one Christmas eve with her refusing to go to the hospital. Opening a small box from ex-hubby containing my wedding rings he’d had reset, thinking I was the luckiest girl in the world. The smells of BBQ weenies and sausage balls wafting through the air. Years later, hanging with boyfriend’s family enjoying their hearty laughter. Helping baby girl decorate her Christmas tree at her first new apartment…

I look so very forward to the future, and making many more memories along the way. I wish the merriest of Christmas blessings for you all…

Four short days away

It shan’t be long now! Hope everyone’s ready (or at least almost) for the big day.

The weather here has been so unseasonably cold for December that no one even knows what to expect anymore. I’ve watched the forecast diligently, and for two days now I’ve seen this:

Could it be, could it be – ohhh mama (said with my best Elvis sneer) could it really be… snow on Christmas? A light dusting to brighten the holiday itself would be nice. But I’ve got some traveling to do, and we all know how Southerners mix with snow and ice – kinda like oil and water.

DeNiro and Hoffman

It’s not often that I watch television. When I do, I can count the shows I watch all on one hand, which aside from Survivor, consist of a little Nat Geo, History and Discovery channel. Last night, I got a real treat – I mean this one was really off the charts for me.

I was finishing wrapping presents and happened to have the tube on in the background, volume low – when I heard the David Letterman show come on. If I’m not already in bed, this would normally cue bedtime. Then they announced who the guests were.

Robert DeNiro and Dustin Hoffman. I’m a huge fan of both.

You may have seen the set of movies that the pair star in together often referred to as ‘The Fockers movies”. Meet the Parents came out in 2000, Meet the Fockers debuted in 2004, and released at theaters just this month was The Little Fockers. If you haven’t seen any of the movies and are a fan of the two, the movies are a must-see, one of my favorites. Here’s a trailer to the 2004 Meet the Fockers, in which the two sets of parents meet and ‘come together’. It’s an awesome cast including Ben Stiller and Barbara Streisand.

In Letterman’s entire career, DeNiro has never been on his show which made it even more special. Much to my delight, the entire hour ended up being theirs. As they introduced the pair, they walked out together and the audience went wild. The applause went on for what seemed like several minutes, which Letterman respectfully allowed. It gave me chills! Hoffman seemed pleased the entire applause, DeNiro laid back being his normal cool self. Once they started talking, it took about ten minutes for DeNiro to ‘warm up’ to Dave’s questions, again, first time ever on the show. Hoffman made jovial of everything which really seemed to help things out in that area. They talked about movies like The Graduate, TootsieRainmanCasino, Goodfellas, Raging BullTaxi Driver and Godfather. I’m a big fan of the mob movies, always have been since I was a girl in school. Needless to say, most actors in this genre of filmmaking far surpass A-okay in my book – there’s too many of them to list (DeNiro and Pacino being my all-time faves).

It was a monumental show last night. This video showcases a few moments of the broadcast, only five minutes or so, but enough to give you the gist. Yeah, I’m starstruck once again. These guys have just never gotten old to me… and never will.

BP (no gas here)

Been feeling junky for the past few days, mainly my throat. Since I wanted to make sure I was well for Christmas I decided to pay a visit to the doc yesterday after work. I’m glad I did.

My blood pressure was once again off the charts, and it turns out it was high the last time I was there too. Yesterday it was 151/100, and I had been there for a while so it’s not like I’d just walked in out of a traffic jam. Stage 2 hypertension is not something I feel I should have since I’ve been managed by a beta blocker many years now, but I guess it happens. Sooo, now I get to be on two medicines for bp. I’m just glad it was caught.

My ever-wise daughter: “Oh my gosh, Mom! You have GOT to be more peaceful and calm down. You need to try some relaxation techniques. Meditate. It really does work! Just sit in candle light and do some really deep breathing for 10 minutes every night. You can’t keep being so wound up!”

I got a quick visual of myself getting stuck in a pretzel position, and it struck a funny bone in me. Then I got to thinking maybe she’s actually onto something. Honestly, I know she is. Stop being so wound up. Don’t sweat the petty things. Don’t pet the sweaty things. Yeah, that’s it! Here’s an old dog trying to learn a new trick again… I’ll be sure let ya know how that works out for me.

Cold

I honestly cannot think of anything this morning but how cold I am. It was 12º when I got up and it’s not expected to even reach freezing today. I’m starting to wonder if I really live in the Carolinas. I came (not so happily) bouncing into work sporting a newfound cold, twenty-plus layers and knockoff uggs. Today I came complete with Tussin CF®, Chloraseptic® and Afrin®. And hey, it’s warm in here! I am set.

Couldn’t miss today, anyway – the company Christmas luncheon is at noon. Oh, how wonderful it feels to say that word – Christmas! Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas. Seems as though I’ve heard the word more this year than ever before, and I love it! So we’ll get catered in today (12 degrees this morning, good day for catering in, wouldn’t ya say?) by an awesome caterer, and enjoy some good team-building time. And errr, food. Did I mention the caterer was awesome?

So I gotta go there – my pet-peeve for the day/week. Yeah, we’ll make it for the week. How about those smartass know-it-alls in life? You know, those people who have the need to knock anything you say either down, top it with their own (new and improved) version, or generally insinuate a less than intelligent status on your part. Sometimes I grow weary of ‘petting’ them – of being nicey-nice in order to smooth things over when something is said that falls into the category of know-it-all. Of being ever-agreeable so as not to appear argumentative. I’d love to do a case-in-point, however that would pretty much lay everything out on the table and somehow I can’t bring myself to do that. Sometimes though, I wonder why I don’t just come right on out and say what I feel, and not worry so much about how it’s perceived. Once in a rare while I’ll turn those tables… and it actually feels good.

It’s becoming increasingly tougher to teach this old dog new tricks anyway.

Photo owned by Lord of the Rings® Trilogy, New Line Cinemas

Tricksters, tricksters!! They’re all tricksters… all of them!! 😆

Christmas, weekend and beach thinking

In reverse order.

The Christmas season has officially begun for most, but for some reason my mind seems to remain stuck on a warm, tropical setting. Instead of Christmas shopping this weekend, I’d rather be packing for a several-day stint at the beach for New Years. I can’t get it off my mind, and anxiously await the week before to at least see how the weather’s looking for the New Year.

I’m going to give my best attempt at finishing my Christmas shopping this weekend. I’m sure they’re will be a few extras to get next week, but even getting the majority done will be a huge relief. In the meantime, I’ll catch a few new oceanic documentaries that my love dvr’d recently for our viewing enjoyment. Uh-oh, here comes that tropical feeling creeping ’round again…

I Saw God Today

Once in a blue moon, a song comes along that makes a such a big impact on me that I must share it and the lyrics. George Strait is a master at such songs. This particular one doesn’t need a description… the title represents it very well.

Really, when you think about it, it’s amazing what all we can see God in within our everyday lives… if we only pay close enough attention.

Here’s a video – you’ll have to overlook the typos, but I did admire the fact that whoever did this compilation adores daisies as much (or more) than I do. Unfortunately, you do have to watch (listen) to it on youtube since it’s copywrited music… but that’s becoming par for the course. It’s my hope that all of us are able to see God in our own day today… blessings to everyone for a warm and wonderful weekend.

Just walked down the street to the coffee shop
Had to take a break
I’d been by her side for 18 hours straight
Saw a flower growin’ in the middle of the sidewalk
Pushin’ up through the concrete
Like it was planted right there for me to see

The flashin’ lights
The honkin’ horns
All seemed to fade away
In the shadow of that hospital at 5:08
I saw God today

I’ve been to church
I’ve read the book
I know he’s here
But I don’t look
Near as often as I should
Yeah, I know I should

His fingerprints are everywhere
I just slowed down to stop and stare
Opened my eyes and man I swear
I saw God today

Saw a couple walkin’ by they were holdin’ hands
Man she had that glow
Yeah I couldn’t help but notice she was startin’ to show it
Stood there for a minute takin’ the sky
Lost in that sunset
Splash of amber melted in the shades of red

I’ve been to church
I’ve read the book
I know he’s here
But I don’t look
Near as often as I should
Yeah, I know I should

His fingerprints are everywhere
I just slowed down to stop and stare
Opened my eyes and man I swear
I saw God today

Got my face pressed up against the nursery glass
She’s sleepin’ like a rock
My name on her wrist
Wearin’ tiny pink socks
She’s got my nose, she’s got her mama’s eyes
My brand new baby girl
She’s a miracle
I saw God today.

Mary Elizabeth

She is finally at peace. Born Mary Elizabeth Anania, her sunrise was July 3, 1949; sunset, December 7, 2010. Elizabeth passed away on a Tuesday at her home in Chapel Hill, NC after a long and courageous battle with breast cancer.

Although I might not have agreed with some of her political stances, I admire and respect the lady for reasons different than what one may expect.

  • Her family meant everything to her. Through the years she managed a very elegant balance between her home life with her husband and children, her professional career as an attorney, then later becoming her husband’s chief policy advisor during a presidential bid.
  • Her courageousness and perseverance was inspiring to all who have fought a disease and those who continue to fight.
  • She maintained such grace and poise after their oldest son Wade was killed in a car crash (age 17) in 1996. I cannot imagine what strength it must take to go on after the death of one of your own children.
  • She lived her private life on a public stage. Yeah, I’m gonna go there. The level of humiliation she must have endured after her husbands indiscretions came to light had to have been gut wrenching. I simply can’t think of any other term to describe it.

In September 2006, Edwards released a book, Saving Graces: Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers, focusing on the death of her son and her illness. In May 2009, she released a second book, Resilience: Reflections on the Burdens and Gifts of Facing Life’s Adversities, further detailing her illness, the deaths of her father and son, the effect of these events on her marriage, her husband’s infidelity, and the general state of health care in America.

On December 6, 2010, Elizabeth’s family announced that she had stopped cancer treatment after her doctors advised her that further treatment would be ‘unproductive’. The cancer had metastasized to her liver, and she had been advised she had several weeks to live. Her family members, including her estranged husband John, were with her. It was on this day she posted her last message on Facebook:

You all know that I have been sustained throughout my life by three saving graces – my family, my friends, and a faith in the power of resilience and hope. These graces have carried me through difficult times and they have brought more joy to the good times than I ever could have imagined. The days of our lives, for all of us, are numbered. We know that. And, yes, there are certainly times when we aren’t able to muster as much strength and patience as we would like. It’s called being human. But I have found that in the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are made all the more meaningful and precious. And for that I am grateful.

Elizabeth always felt that Wade was an angel, and that one day she would be able to see him again. Somehow I feel you’ve already found Wade, dear Elizabeth. May you rest in peace now.

Factual source: Wikipedia