Oh I’ve got it badddd, I admit it. Probably bad enough to sicken the average person, really. So I don’t write about my love life much at all – I’ve kept it to myself for some time now. At long last, I believe I’ve earned the right to spill my guts.
There is no formula or logic to love. Being in love is like an anchor of reason and romance living in balance. Real love is a complete acceptance of the other person, and of oneself. It resides in the knowledge of one another – what our strengths are, what our weaknesses are, and what our potential is.
So just how DO you know when you’re really in love, that head-over-heels all-consuming kind of love? Now before you judge my own personal reasons below, let me first say that this is not a new relationship. The admittedly amateurish things I’m about to write might lead one to the conclusion this is a brand new infatuation of sorts.
When I receive an email or text I jump right to it, thinking it’s him. Same thing with a phone call. When I notice it’s not from him, I get the same sinking disappointing feeling every time (sorry, friends and family). When it is from him, my stomach suddenly takes on the role of Flipper. He’s on my mind every waking minute of the day. At night, he’s the one I dream of.
I miss him so much when we’re apart, that it almost can be described as an aching type of longing. When we’re together, it just feels right. Everything. All the integers of a successful relationship are present. The level of respect we have for one another is astounding, as well as the appreciation we both have for what we’ve finally found.
I have visions. Not the prediction type – more like daydreams of the life that I imagine for the future. I go off into my own little world with these visions of bliss and happiness. On the other hand – sometimes these visions take a dark u-turn when I have one about losing him. That’s the thing about visions, they build themselves – so oftentimes your worst fears manifest within one.
The way he looks at me makes me melt. His beautiful eyes often tell me a story – it’s difficult to explain. When he looks at me, I can all but see into his soul… I can feel how he is feeling, what he is feeling. His deep voice is both seductive and consuming – it makes me feel safe in a way that I never have before. I can hear his voice even when he’s not around.
I know it’s that kind of love because I can no longer imagine my life without him in it. The mere thought of losing him makes my eyes well up every time… Simply knowing the kind of man he is makes me strive to be a better woman.
And that, my friends, is mi Amore.♥